Real Men in Church

Real Men in Church – Men After God’s Own Heart!

What would you say to men if you had the opportunity – about men being men in the church?

What does it mean to be real men in the church?

I was thinking about who we see as real men – I guess we tend to think adventurers…

• Edmund Hillary – climbing Mt Everest
• Chuck Yeager – first man to fly at Mach 1
• Donald Campbell – land speed record holder
• Ken Warby – water speed record – inventor of the phrase “that man’s an idiot”
• Captain Joseph Kittinger – you don’t know this one do you? Jumped from a balloon at 31.3 kilometres and free fell at a terminal velocity of 988kmh (1960).

But does the fact they do daredevil stuff – make them real men? Or are they just idiots putting their lives in danger? One of my mates is right into mountain bikes – proper down-hill-if-you-fall-off-you-might-die mountain bike racing – he fell off recently – broke his kneecap, leg, arm, shoulder, 3 ribs and the little wings off 4 of his vertebrae – he’s a good bloke but I’m not sure I want to say the fact that he’s an idiot who wants to race down mountains on a push bike makes him a real man. He’s also a firey so maybe he is!?

Maybe it’s the warriors – war heroes. If we’re giving out real men awards we might consider pilots in WW2 – the Germans were targeting V1 rockets on London – the pilots would fly alongside and use the Spitfire wing to tip the rocket off course causing it to explode harmlessly in the air. That is impressive manly stuff.

Maybe we think of actors – Charlton Heston, John Wayne, Cary Grant, George Clooney, Harrison Ford, Will Smith, Sam Worthington… Bruce Willis… has nothing to do with them being real men – some of them seem like good blokes, down to earth – some of them are more female heart-throbs than real men – but I guess if I’d said Jim Carrey, Rowan Atkinson or… Adam Sandler – they don’t quite fit the right image?

Maybe real men are the blokes on Top Gear – TV for real men – Richard Hammond – real man? Jeremy Clarkson – real man? James May??? Puts us in a bit of quandary – it would be hard to think of a TV show better suited to real men – yet the presenters are so different? Our own version of the show with Shane Jacobson and two other blokes – well it was a flop even though Shane is pretty much the stereotype of the big Aussie man – burgers and bbqs and beer – a total boofhead.

The Husband Store

So I discovered the other day that there’s a new store in New York – called “The Husband Store!” It’s a store that sells husbands – for women to choose the perfect man. As you enter the store you’re greeted like royalty and escorted to the lift – and handed an instruction sheet.

You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and as the lift ascends each level so do the qualities and attributes of the men. You can choose a bloke from any floor but you can’t go back to a lower floor!

So, this woman goes in one day to find a husband. Into the lift and up to the 1st floor – the doors open and she reads the sign over the doors; 1st Floor – these men have jobs and love the Lord (it’s America).

Sounds great – but what does the next floor contain. So up she goes. The lift opens and the second floor sign reads; 2nd Floor – These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

Tempting – really who could want for more! But she presses the button. The doors open… 3rd Floor – these men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are extremely good looking and guaranteed to remain faithful.

“WOW”. This is sensational – yet she feels compelled – she might miss out… so she pushes the button. The doors open and she reads… 4th Floor – These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are incredibly good looking, guaranteed to remain faithful and help with the housework.

Tempting as it is to simply rush out and grab one off the rack she can hardly stand the suspense, and simply presses the button, fidgeting as the lift ascends. The doors open and she reads… 5th Floor – these men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are unbelievably gorgeous, are guaranteed to remain faithful, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She almost pounces on the button, hardly able to contain herself wondering what on earth the 6th floor might hold that could be better. The door opens and she steps out, eagerly scanning the sign, a large electronic display which reads… 6th Floor – You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

Men after Gods Own Heart

So we’ve got men in the world… we’ve got women’s expectations… and we’ve got the church – us!?

How do we be real men in the church?

The Bible has a huge amount to say about being real men.

In Acts 13 Paul is explaining the OT to a group of Jews and Gentile converts to Judaism – on the Sabbath in the Synagogue – he goes through their history so they can see that Jesus truly is the long awaited Messiah. And he speaks about King David – and David had one particular quality, different to the kings of surrounding nations and different even to the rest of the kings of Israel.

Acts 13:21-22 “Then the people asked for a king, and he gave them Saul son of Kish, of the tribe of Benjamin, who ruled forty years. After removing Saul, he made David their king. He testified concerning him: ‘I have found David son of Jesse a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do.’”

Saul was a shallow vain king – just like the kings of surrounding nations – in the end he had no relationship with God. But God’s assessment of David before he was king – a man after God’s own heart. We read the same words in Jeremiah 3 – one of the main OT passages that speaks about the coming Messiah, at a time when Israel is falling apart and are looking for God to save them from themselves – Jeremiah speaks of a time to come…

Jeremiah 3:15 “Then I will give you shepherds after my own heart, who will lead you with knowledge and understanding.”

Jeremiah is ultimately talking about Jesus – the passage goes on to speak about the coming of the Messiah.

What do we know about the Church? I’ll tell you the big one – we know that the church is God’s! We belong to God – in a very real sense we are his possession – Christ is the king.

2 Corinthians 6:16b “For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people.”

The church is God’s people living God’s way – God has given us the promise he gave Israel – to be our God and that we would belong to him forever and share his glory.

Let’s pull this all together. David as King was not to be a ruler like other rulers who used their position to lord their power over others. He was to be a servant king and particularly to serve Israel as a model – the people of Israel were called to follow David’s example as a man after God’s own heart. Just as we Christians are called to follow Jesus – not simply in his footsteps or doing good works or preaching the gospel or whatever – but to follow Jesus who was a shepherd ‘after God’s own heart’. This is not about leaders and ministers but about ordinary Christian men and women – and I’m just looking at us boys today – as we look around the Bible at what it says about us men – we are to be men after God’s own heart. We are to be men whose life and heart is from the same mould as God’s. Having been made in God’s image, to have a heart that strives after that image. That was the thing about King David – he was not perfect – in fact at times he was an appalling sinner, though I’m sure we can’t throw stones his way. God chose him not because he was beautiful, handsome, tall, politically connected, well liked or from the right family – he was the youngest son of a family of shepherds – a total nobody. God chose him as king because his heart belonged to God.

In our world we value our men if they are strong, wise, shrewd, educated, have nouse and guts, manage people, use time well etc. They might all be important – or not – but when we come to the church we need men who are men “after God’s own heart”.

I like that husband store joke – you’re not sure whether to laugh or just smile knowingly.

Let me tell you another.

A man was walking along a Melbourne beach, deep in prayer for the people of Tasmania – and he calls out to God; “Lord grant me one wish”. The sky clouded and a booming voice said, “Well mate – you have been a faithful servant so I will grant you one wish.” The man said, “Build a bridge to Tasmania so I can drive over anytime I want to take the gospel to those godless men and women.”

The Lord answered, “Whilst your motives are pretty good think of the logistics – the bridge supports into Bass Straight, the storms and danger – the concrete and steel required just makes it a huge job – you know I can do it but it’s pretty hard to justify. Think again – ask for something that would honor me”.

The man thought for a long time and finally said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know what they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say ‘nothing’, and how I can make a woman truly happy?”

After a few minutes God said, “How many lanes did you want on that bridge?”

Jokes are fun – but jokes also tell us about our world – and especially about the damage sin has done – about the damage between men and women. We know that God’s judgment against men and women in Genesis has come true – women desire to be in the role of men and men want authority over women. And in lots of churches I reckon that the consequence we are seeing is that men take a back seat in church life and we just keep the ladies happy. That’s a strong statement I know and maybe it’s not true here – but I have to say I’ve seen it enough times – it’s easier to let the women have their say in how churches work.

Yet I would say what we need are churches with men taking the lead – just like David did with Israel – maybe we won’t all be king – but then David’s job was to be an example first.

I don’t just mean that men should be taking on all the different ministry roles in the church. Every minister wants to fill up the program with people and then create more programs requiring more people. What I really mean is that men should be doing David’s job – being men after God’s own heart and taking the lead, being the example in life and love and faithfulness and service.

Titus 1:5-9 “The reason I left you in Crete was that you might straighten out what was left unfinished and appoint elders in every town, as I directed you. An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. Since an overseer is entrusted with God’s work, he must be blameless—not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. Rather he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.”

This is not just about the overseers and leaders but about the men – just as David was to be an example of a God driven character to the people of Israel – so Titus is to be and to appoint men with God’s heart to the leadership of the church that they might be the example to all men in the church.

Jesus says the same thing to his disciples – after they have walked dusty roads in sandals – and Jesus is on the floor washing their feet and says…

John 13:15 I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you

Jesus is the head – the chief shepherd – he wants us to be faithful, to be men after his own heart – to be servants – and his practical example was that he washed their feet and said – go and do the same thing.

The leaders that Titus is to choose are not good leadership material – they are simply real Christian men – not actors, athletes and adventurers – but rather Christian men whose characters are modelled after Christ and shines through the day-to-day mess of life.

Maybe we need to ask… why do we need men with character in the church – men like David?

We could go to any number of passages to see why. We could look at Ephesians 2 and talk about the fact that we are God’s workmanship created by God to do good works in Christ Jesus. We could look at 1 Corinthians 12 and the Spiritual gifts that we have all received.

But have a look at 1 Timothy.

1 Timothy 1:12-17 “I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service. Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honour and glory forever and ever. Amen.

I reckon the world needs to see that men go to church – men are involved in church life – not because their wives are or their families but because we know – we know deep down inside us that we have been saved from our sins – that despite the fact we in no way deserved God’s grace… he has given it to us anyway. Men need to see men as Christians. Women need to see it – our wives and daughters need to see that men stand for Christ and we should be leading them in the faith. Our sons need to know that we have turned away from sin and to Jesus and that we are taking the opportunities to grow and serve. Why – because we want them to share what we have received – surely? I want my wife to know the fullness of God’s love for her so that she will be safe forever. I want my son and daughters to know what it means to be a Christian and how to live as a Christian in this crazy confusing world – and no-one else is going to do what I can do – no-one else is going to care like I do that they are safe.

I like Paul’s words to Timothy because there is no doubt in Paul’s mind what has happened. He was a thoroughly convinced persecutor of Christians – he would leave Richard Dawkins or any of the modern atheists in the shade – a blasphemer and a violent man – Paul not Dawkins. Paul’s life was turned around by the grace and kindness of God – grace poured out even on a terrible sinner like Paul. And Paul gets it – it drove his life from that moment.

If the church was filled with men who got it – who like Paul were driven by the conversion, driven by the change in their life at the hands of God – what would we see? What difference would it make?

Are you driven by the change that Christ brought to you?

If you’re not a Christian – just investigating maybe – that’s cool – cause if you decide to follow Jesus you need to know what you are up for. Jesus wants you – he designed you for a relationship with him – so now is very defiantly the time to hand over control and ask for forgiveness.

If you’ve been a Christian for a while – what you are doing with it? Are you a man after God’s own heart – are you a man who is progressively looking like Christ? Or are you a man that makes excuses?

Let me tell you a quick story – and finish with a Psalm.

The names have been changed to protect the… Brendan was a big Aussie male – tough, solid, faithful Christian, very well off, very well regarded, the CEO of one of the largest Insurance companies in Australia – and at Church he looked the perfect Christian. I asked him to come and speak to my young adults group about being a Christian in the workplace. He sort of paused for a minute and then said – look I’m not sure I can do that. At work I’m not a Christian – I’m just a ruthless business man – I don’t work as a Christian. So I wouldn’t know what to say to others about being a Christian in the workplace.

I didn’t get him to speak!

Psalm 51:10-17 “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn back to you. Save me from guilt that requires my blood, O God, the God who saves me, and my tongue will sing of your righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.”

The Dummies Guide to Ministry

Introduction… Stewardship

How do we as Christians practically act as God’s stewards in this world? A steward is someone who looks after the owner’s property and protects the owner’s interests. Money, time, energy and everything else is exercised according to the owner’s instructions. They manage the property and honestly report to the owner every detail. One of the foundational passages for this in the NT is the parable of the talents.

Matthew 25:14-18 “Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money.”

In four blogs I want to look at Maturity, Ministry, Materialism and Money… to do so with some practical ideas – what do our choices and commitments say about our faith? Would someone know we are a Christian by the way we speak, the way we act, the way we spend our time, the movies we watch, the company we keep, the books we read, the way we spend money, the way we act at work, the way we treat the poor, the way we speak to or about our spouse or kids?

If you’ve ever been tempted to read one of the “Dummies Guide’s to…” – well that’s my aim – a “Dummies Guide to Stewardship”. You don’t have to be dumb or act dumb – a dummies guide is simply a non expert’s guide – an everyday guide. Stewardship for us is not a matter of putting into practice our expertise but rather putting into practice our beliefs and our trust.

I want to challenge you for four commitments.

1. Maturity… actively working towards maturity in Christ through prayer, Bible reading, regular church attendance and ministry.
2. Ministry… to use God given gifts in ministry for the encouragement and building up of Christians and the ministry of the Gospel
3. Materialism… to prayerfully and courageously stand against the world in the pursuit of happiness through possessions.
4. Money… to give generously and regularly to the ministry of the gospel in your church.

A Dummies Guide to Ministry

Two Little Boys – P.S. it’s a Joke!!!!

• Two little boys, 8 & 10 were always getting into trouble – whenever anything happened in their small town their parents knew their sons would get the blame. But mum heard on the grapevine that there was a clergyman who’d been successful in disciplining kids, so she asked him to speak with her boys. He agreed to see them individually the next day.
• So, mum sends her youngest down to the church next morning. The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the boy down and asked him sternly, “Where is God?”
• The boy’s goes to speak, but makes no sound, sitting there with his mouth hanging open.
• The clergyman repeats the question. “Where is God?”
• Again, the boy makes gives no answer.
• The clergyman raises his voice, shakes his finger and bellows, “Where is God!?”
• The little boy screamed, sprinted from the room, ran home to hide in his wardrobe, slamming the door behind him. His brother finds him crying, and asks; “What happened?”
• The little boy, fighting off tears says: “We’re in so much trouble – this is bigger than anything we’ve ever done. God’s missing, and they think we did it!”

Ministry’s such fun!

The Church 100 years on!

100 years ago that story might well have been a good description of church – things have changed dramatically (though you can still find churches that would not think this joke was a joke!). Ministers were scary – fire and brimstone preachers bellowing about sin and damnation from pulpits high in the air – dressed in black with big black Bibles. They still exist!

In the Anglican church and in plenty of others what the priest said was law – except it had greater authority because it came from God. The priest had standing in the church and the community; he was an integral part of society. Churches did limited ministries – teaching happened at church by the preacher. It happened in the home when every member of the family was catechised – which is what catechists used to do – come to your home and teach you the catechism – it’s in the back of the prayer book. The Priest preached and read services, did the prayers and the readings (3 or 4, even 5 at times) – there were few lay preachers or readers. Sunday Schools, if they existed, were tightly controlled by the minister, there were few youth groups, mostly no Bible Study groups (we have the Wesleys to thank for those in the modern church) – the ones that existed were an opportunity for the priest to come to preach to the gathered group in your home. I know this probably seems foreign to most – yet I know from personal experience that some groups still operate this way, and some ministers and even lay people operate this way.

Makes me wonder how they dealt with a passage like…

1 Peter 4:7-9 “Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ…”

Mostly today the church is very different. The 16^thC Reformation changed how we view church and ministry by going back to NT principles – especially that ministry was never meant to be the exclusive domain of the professional ministers and priests. Peter speaks of the new people of God, the church, as a priesthood of all believers.

1 Peter 2:9-10 “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.”

Once we did not belong – we were not the people of God – but together now Christians are the people of God, the priests of the kingdom, called to declare the praises of Jesus who called us out of darkness – we are chosen and we are priests – a holy nation that crosses all boundaries, all colours, all national and racial differences to form one nation of priests under God.

The Dummies Guide to Ministry says… Ministry is not the domain of professionals – it is the responsibility and lifestyle of all who believe.

The Priesthood of all Believers

Peter writes about change – the real change that’s required of those who belong to Jesus. This shouldn’t come as a surprise – at least the theory – yet Peter goes to great lengths to describe the changes. His letters describe Christians at length – the new people of God – a chosen people, a royal priesthood, holy, a nation belonging to God, receivers of God’s mercy – God’s elect, strangers in the world, no longer strangers to God – spread throughout the world, yet gathered around the word, gathered before the throne of God – the chosen ones, made clean by God, sanctified by the Holy Spirit, chosen for obedience, made one with Christ by his blood, granted peace and God’s grace in abundance. Why go on and on?

Why so many descriptions of the change?

Is it so detailed because even after 2000 years we still struggle to leave our old lives behind and be wholeheartedly committed to the new?

1 Peter 4:3 “For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry.”

All this we must leave behind gratefully, enthusiastically, with a sense of the reality that faces all people – that we must face God and deal with the lifestyle we have led.

1 Peter 4:4-5 “They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you. But they will have to give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead.”

In the face of imminent judgement – how are we to live?

1 Peter 4:7-9 “The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms.  If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.”

Living as Priests

This passage is the Dummies Guide to Ministry. As we read the rest of Peter we can see that as God’s gathered people we are to be holy, to be self controlled, to purify ourselves through reading and obeying the Scriptures. We are to love one another, to crave what is good, to encourage rather than tear down, to get rid of all the relational tools that don’t belong in the church – malice, rage, anger, slander – there are standards of behaviour and love that we must live according to, no matter how imperfectly.

It is spectacularly easy to fail in these areas, to fall back into the behaviours of our old life, to revive the relational tools we were committed to as non-Christians. If that’s where you find yourself – failing in relationships as Peter is speaking of here – it’s not impossible to change, though it will often feel like it is. If you wrong someone – apologise – go to them and seek forgiveness – be open about it, talk about it – ask them to forgive you. It’s tempting to just ask God and to think that’s enough – it’s not. When we sin we sin against God and people – we need to seek the forgiveness of both. If its 20 years ago then deal with it today – seek forgiveness today. Forgiveness can only happen when you seek it. And if you fail today – seek forgiveness from the person you have wronged and repent and start again. And if you fail tomorrow do it again. How many times do we need to forgive – or be forgiven…? Jesus says 7 times 70? 7 is the number of God, times the number of God, times 10. We might say infinity + 1.

Christians are the priesthood of the kingdom – we have a new lifestyle – not one given to satisfying our cravings but given to ministry. Don’t think of ministry as a great list of gifts and abilities – Pater has no lists – this is the Dummies Guide – the experts guide for the rest of us – it gives us the simplicity of love and hospitality. Every Christian is a minister – we are each responsible to build, encourage, teach and train – to use our gifts, which every one of us has been given, to further the work of the gospel. We are to think clearly and carefully about life, relationships, the world, church, the cross, salvation, money, family – think clearly about this things from God’s point of view. We are to be self controlled – not pursuing things that will kill us but instead that which will save and keep us. It’s the work of a lifetime – to give up pagan commitments and commit to the work and life of Christ. Ministry starts with love.

Ministry Starts With Love

Actually – ministry starts with recognition – every one of us is a minister. There are no pew sitters in Christ’s kingdom.

1 Peter 4:7 “Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms.”

We have to start by believing God – he declares he has gifted us for his work.

Do you believe God?

Do you believe God when he says that you have been gifted by Him for the work of ministry? I guess I’d want to ask if you think God hasn’t gifted you – why is that? Why would God single you out to lack the gifts to serve in ministry – when he clearly promises that every Christian is gifted for the good of the church?

Maybe it’s hard for you to see where you can serve – maybe you need help working out where to get involved – maybe you need an environment that supports you or a ministry team who will encourage you – but the Bible is clear that each of us, as Christ’ chosen people, have been given the gifts required to serve Christ’s church faithfully.

1 Peter 4:9 “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.”

The thing is – getting involved in ministry is not a complex issue. It’s not a matter of discovering a specific gift – though that can help. Rather it’s a matter of realising the wonder of what we have received – the grace of God, the riches of Christ, the glory of heaven, and the forgiveness of sins… once we realise how unbelievable it is that we are in a right relationship with God through Christ – ministry is the means by which we will share that news. Ministry starts with love that is clear about the nature of this world and the judgement to come and out of love for God and others shares the gospel.

When two people get married – how ready are they for what’s to come?

Let’s be honest – they are not!? They’re not ready for the changes, the commitment, the differences, the day-to-day wonder of learning to live in intimate relationship. But… we commit to love and to service – to love one another to the exclusion of anything that will destroy, wreck, hurt, damage etc.

It’s the same in ministry – we don’t have to know precisely what our gift is or how to use it – what we need is a commitment to love. With self control – not living just for pleasure… and with clear mindedness – not clouded with the world – and a commitment to pray – we must love each other deeply and offer hospitality without grumbling.

The Whole of Ministry

This is not just the Dummies Guide to Ministry – this is the whole of ministry. Everything else fits into these two ideas. Firstly Peter speaks of Agape – love of a family member – Christians – we are to demonstrate a real and abiding love for each other firstly by sharing the gospel together and building each other up in the truth of God’s word. That love is powerful because it can bring about the obliteration of sins. Peter says “love covers over a multitude of sins” – in the context of church and relationships and ministry. He doesn’t mean we sweep the sins under the carpet – we don’t deal with them as some churches do with a false ceremony of absolution, which has no effect whatsoever. No – the love of the Christian community can deal with sin – on the basis of love we can make sin disappear – we can remove the stain of sin from our relationship and relate to each other not based on sin but on holiness. The pain from personal hurt may well remain, but relationships can be rebuilt. Peter says we are through with sin – that was our lifestyle but no longer. Our practice should meet up with the theory, and though it never will in this world, that is what we are to strive for. We minister together when we deal with sin, forgive sin and no longer treat each other as sinners but as forgiven and beautiful.

Can I just make a bit of an aside and be really, really clear. Sweeping sins under the carpet is not what we are talking about. I wouldn’t suggest for a moment that a victim of abuse (for example) should be told that “love covers over a multitude of sins” as though that somehow fixes the sin of others who did the abusing – it doesn’t in any sense. But go from a different position – the active, compassionate, practical, persistent and long term love of a Christian congregation towards a victim of abuse can mend brokenness and ‘cover over’ the sins and bring healing.

• A girl who has been abused by her mother might (eventually) find a whole group of mums at church that care for her and provides the sort of relationship a daughter has with a mum. It’s not the same – but it can bring healing and strength, a person or people to confide in, get advice from and to learn from. The mum still needs to be brought to account if that’s possible. But you know what churches so often do – they support the mum because they can’t believe their friend would ever do such a thing, and they condemn the girl and try to force her back into the abusive relationship.
• Or consider the case of a paedophile priest – for too long the church has fumbled around ineptly dealing with these issues – all too often by sweeping the sin under the carpet, blaming the victims, and paying people off whilst moving priests to new location where their past is not obvious. The church has taken the idea of ‘love covering over a multitude of sins’ entirely the wrong way! This is wrong! The victims of abuse deserve support and love that in time may cover the effects of the sin by rebuilding trust, faith and hope. And for some victims this will not be complete until we reach heaven – in fact maybe for most victims. All too often the victims are the ones rejected by the church – frankly this is reprehensible – if we do that we deserve the condemnation we so often receive in the media. But a church can also demonstrate the love of Christ by not covering over the sin, by not excusing the behaviour of the abuser, by not condemning the abuse victim, by not allowing the evil to continue, by not assuming that the priest could never have done such things because he’s always been such a lovely man, by not excusing sin as an aberration. The priest who abuses deserves to feel the full effects of the law and the condemnation of the church. Whilst the aim of the law is punishment, the aim of the church is to bring that priest back from sin to forgiveness and relationship – but that should not EVER be an easy path and they must NEVER be trusted without responsible and obvious supervision at all times – that is part of loving both the victim and the perpetrator – and even of loving those who could have been victims had the priest been allowed to continue. They must repent publicly and openly (within the bounds of the law) – there must be no prevarication – they must be thrown out of the church and we must not fellowship with them until they are fully aware of their sinfulness, and make a full, honest and public confession and pay for their crimes – we must treat them like the criminals they are. If and only when they have completed an appropriate lengthy time of repentance and excommunication should they be allowed back into fellowship – under the strictest conditions and warnings. We may forgive the truly repentant, we may choose to fellowship again with them and treat them as a fellow Christian, but it is right that their sin should follow them – for the sake of others.

Anyway – back to the Dummies Guide – the second part of ministry is this…

1 Peter 4:9 “…Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.”

The word hospitality is not really the word we think of – it comes from a Greek word that means to demonstrate love to the stranger. It’s hard to see that in English. On the one hand we are to love our brothers and sisters deeply – with such love that we face up to sin – we don’t sweep it under the carpet but we deal with it – and once dealt with we forgive and get rid of it and no longer relate on the basis of the sin (duly noting what I have said above about abuse) – and – we are to love the stranger in our midst. We are to welcome strangers into our gatherings and into our lives. We are to give them of ourselves, our homes, our wealth, our resources, our time, our energy – we have a responsibility as priests of the Kingdom to…

1 Peter 2:9 “…declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.”

True love for non-Christians is not to condone their lifestyle by getting involved in the pursuit of pleasure (which so many Christians do – and I’m guessing all middle class western Christians probably fall into that trap at least at some point)… but to call them out of darkness into God’s wonderful light – to help them confront their sin and deal with it obediently under Christ.

A Dummies Guide

If we’re going to be practical about this then how do we do it? How do we minister? The Dummies Guide to Ministry is about good basic practical things.

• The end of all things is near – so don’t give into the world but live prayerful, self controlled lives – be clear about the world.
• Christians – love each other deeply. Love is ministry – love leads to ministry and love deals with sin.
• Love those who are not Christs’ people – yet! Tell them the truth and help them be won to Christ – this is ministry.
• Each of us has been given gifts for the purpose of serving Christ’s Church.
• Use your gift to faithfully administer God’s grace.
• If your giftedness is as a speaker of the Word then speak as though God were speaking – be humble but strong, loving but don’t water it down, ever truthful but gentle.
• If your giftedness is a service gift get on with it and do it with the strength God provides.
• Whatever you do in life as a Christian you are a minister – in all things we should live so that God may be praised through Jesus Christ.
• The end result of ministry should be…

1 Peter 4:9 “…that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.”

From our ministry people should be left praising God.

Waking the Sleeping Giant – Spiritual Gifts 2

Psalm 139:14 “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

In a previous post I wrote about the need to use the gifts God has given us and given to the church – that we need to awaken the sleeping giant that is the church by valueing all people the way God made them, by understanding that God has given each Christian gifts for ministry – not just skills but gifts that are for the benefit of the church, for building the kingdom and proclaiming the gospel. Just as the human body is made up of many parts that do different jobs but are equally necessary and valuable so too the church is made up of many parts and we each have a ministry that we have been prepared by God to exercise – and God has prepared a place in church for us that we might exercise those gifts for the benefit of the church.

So… keeping on that same track…

What’s love got to do with it?!?!? Well… I’m going to say that love has everything to do with it!

What is Love?

One of the fun parts of wedding interviews is asking the prospective couple to explain why they want to get married… without using the word “love”.

You should try it… explain your love for someone without using the word.

I love you!

Think about it! What do we mean? What does every wedding couple say? We know what we mean but we don’t know how to say it? Which is strange because everyone wants it, pretty much no one can live without it – but we can’t explain it. Love is… all around us… hard to find, easy to loose – you can’t buy love… tell that to jewellers before Valentine’s Day.

The Bible tells us God defines love – God is love.

Do we know what love isn’t?

• Love is not killing your kids when they’ve done the same stupid thing for the 50^th time.
• Love is not killing your parents when they’ve treated you unfairly yet again.
• Love is not getting revenge.
• Love is not lust.
• Love is not envious, proud or dangerous.

Remember the song in the 70’s – “love hurts”? Frankly, that’s rubbish. When you can’t have your own way and you feel love for someone who doesn’t return your feelings then yes that hurts you personally. But real love gives strength and courage, not damage. Real love defends, protects, cares and heals. Love provides, serves, guards, is selfless. Real love provides a foundation to build on – and love is the foundation of spiritual gifts.

It’s all about…

1 Corinthians 12-14 is often held up as THE most significant passages in the Bible about Spiritual gifts. All the gifts courses include this list of gifts, and you spend your time reading these passages and trying to work out what your specific gifts may be. The problem is – 1 Corinthians 12-14 is not about spiritual gifts. Listen!

1 Corinthians 12:4-7 “Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.”

1 Corinthians 12:31 – 13:3 “And I will show you a still more excellent way. If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

1 Corinthians 14:1 “Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts…”

1 Corinthians 14:12 “…since you are eager for manifestations of the Spirit, strive to excel in building up the church.”

The emphasis is not spiritual gifts. If we use our grammar skills – the subject of these verses is not ‘spiritual gifts’ but rather… love. The unity that comes from being loved by one God, love that should be the daily expression of God’s people, building up each other because of God’s love – if you’re going to excel in anything make sure it’s in gifts that build others up. That is the focus – not the gifts but the building each other up in love. This is vital in our understanding of spiritual gifts.

Imagine a child – beautiful, cute strong – infectious smile. Our aim for a child – is growth, is maturity. We want them to develop into a young person with skills, gifts, education, experiences and particularly faith in Jesus. But if they never know love, they can be the most gifted and educated person on the planet and they’ll be twisted and deformed.

Is it important to discover their gifts, teach them to speak in tongues or even preach the gospel – or is it important to give them love, to express God’s love to them, to teach by example what it means to love one another? Without discounting gifts for even a moment – I want the first to be true first…!

Without Love…?

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

As much as spiritual gifts are important, to focus on them is to miss the point. That may well be the situation Paul was writing to – the Corinthian Christians were people who’d come out of a spiritualist, pagan background, who were used to apparent spiritual activity in their pagan worship practices – and now seeing the Holy Spirit as a source of spiritual power and going ballistic in their efforts to gain spiritual powers, to be seen as “spiritual beings”.

We can be the most righteous, most selfless, poorest martyr able to explain the words of God with clarity and knowledge, able to speak in wild tongues – but without love it’s empty and meaningless. Same with preaching! I reckon one of the questions many preachers need to answer is not whether they can preach, or whether they know the scriptures. I don’t want to downplay those – they are vital – but maybe even more important is… “do they love their congregation(s)?” Because without love their preaching is meaningless.

Let’s see how it works in Jesus life. Jesus came to this earth because of love.

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Jesus was uniquely qualified and gifted. He alone could defeat sin. He alone could defeat death. He alone could pay for the sins of the whole human race and come out the other end unscathed. If anyone is powerful it’s Jesus.  But Jesus didn’t first set out to discover his gifts and then seek out those he could use his gift with. He didn’t do a gift inventory or a training program – seven steps to becoming the saviour of the universe.

He came to the world God loves, to express God’s love – to be God’s love to us.

We can’t begin to imagine what it would be like if God did not love his world – certainly he wouldn’t have sent Jesus just because he could fix the problems.  Imagine if John 3:16 said “For Jesus God’s Son was so gifted that God decided to sacrifice him for the planet he despised…” There is no way God would have sent Jesus – except that he loves us.

If I make spiritual gifts the central issue then I become the focus.  It comes down to my gifts, how God has made me, what ministry is there for me to do, what place do I have?

When love for God and for others is the issue then we start to reflect God’s priorities instead. What can I do to serve you? What can I do to serve God? How can I be God’s love towards others? How can I express Christ’s love to my brothers and sisters? Who is the focus – if love is the issue then loving God and loving my neighbour is the focus – obedient service. If the gift is the issue then the danger I am in is that I become the focus.

The Thing About Love?

Love is an incredible thing – if you know that someone loves you… you become one of the most powerful people on the planet. Love empowers and strengthens. Think about weddings – what passage do people want read at weddings? So often it’s this!

1 Corinthians 12:4-8a “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.”

Is it true? Look at the marriages where that was the passage used at the wedding – is it true of that marriage? What about 5 or 10 or 20 years down the track? How many divorces happened in marriages where this passage was held up as the standard that the marriage was going to attain to?

The reason love is so hard to describe is that its complex – but it’s also simple. Love is about others! Not self-seeking but looking for the good of others. It’s hard for me to get really angry at my wife – not because I’m good at keeping my cool but because we love each other and we know that getting angry will just make it harder – which is not to say we don’t get angry at each other. If you love someone then you will choose to go slowly on the road to anger – there are so many other ways to help the person you love. Real love forgets the wrongs of the past – because otherwise it will fail spectacularly.

Real love protects, trusts, hopes, perseveres – actually real love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres – if you love your husband or wife then you will do anything it takes to protect them, to help them trust you, to give them real hope, and strength and courage – and the same for your kids, and your friends, and your brothers and sisters.

The Corinthians had found that Spiritual Gifts could be a battlefield where the strong walked all over the weak. It was a competition; who had the most gifts, the higher gifts, who looked “spiritual”. There was no place for love – no place for others and their needs. And they were honouring certain gifts very highly and not others – giving importance to things that were spectacular for their own sake rather than to things that proclaimed Jesus’ name and God’s love. If you didn’t have certain gifts – the spectacular gifts of tongues and healing – then you weren’t much chop as a Christian – bit second rate. As soon as I say it that way we can see just how foolish and wrong it was and how right Paul is to call them back to what matters.

The Day is Approaching

What matters is what lasts. Jesus himself tells us to invest our time and energy, who we are as people into the things that will last – into eternal things rather than the things of this planet.

Matthew 6:20 “…store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.”

Paul is saying the same thing – not to invest in gifts but in what lasts.

1 Corinthians 12:8-12 “But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.”

We live in an imperfect world – hard to believe I know. And God has given us a taste of life in the kingdom, life at peace with God. We have the word of God spoken and written – the prophecies, we have knowledge of God – imperfect and faint but real – we know in part, we can tell others in part, we can share with each other the glimpses we have from God. But the day is approaching when all the imperfect things will pass away. At the moment we are children…

1 Corinthians 13:11-12 “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.”

The day is coming when our childhood will be over – the old world will pass in favour of God’s kingdom – and many things that we value highly now will go too. What we see poorly now – the face of God, what we hear poorly now – the voice of God – what we know now in a limited way – the person and character of God – we will see and hear and understand perfectly in heaven. We won’t need prophecies, or preaching, or healing or miracles, we won’t need tongues or gifts of knowledge – we will be perfect in a perfect place. But three things will remain in heaven.

1 Corinthians 13:13 “…faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”

What should we spend our energies on – that which will last! As we seek to be God’s people and to be obedient, and as we seek to build his kingdom and our church let’s make sure that we focus on that which matters. If you don’t know what your gifts are that’s ok – in the end what matters is that we love and serve others based on that love. Whatever your gift or gifts we must focus on sharing God’s love and serving others – the foundation of the gifts of God’s Spirit is love.

1 Peter 1:22-25 “Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart, since you have been born again, not of perishable seed but of imperishable, through the living and abiding word of God; for “All flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls, but the word of the Lord remains forever. And this word is the good news that was preached to you.”

How do you wake a sleeping giant? Spiritual Gifts 1

We are God’s workmanship!

How do you feel about yourself – do you like who you are? Are you gifted? Are you an introvert or an extravert, an optimist or a pessimist – a little of both? Are you clever, cute, bright, smart, talented, special, beautiful, handsome – all of the above – or maybe the opposite? In our world if you’re one of the beautiful people then it’s all yours – if not?

So many children are growing up thinking that they have no value unless they can be certain things or do certain things or get to a certain level of life. Every day in shopping centres you can see at least one of the reasons… parents who abuse their kids emotionally and mentally, using every name they can think of, and a few we’d rather not. In western culture we worry so much about smacking or caning or other forms of physical punishment – but in my experience many more children suffer to a far greater degree from emotional and mental abuse (without for a moment excusing or condoning any form of physical abuse). So many people can’t get a handle on their life because parents never told them how much they were loved, how special they were, how wonderfully they were made.

Do you know – regardless of how we see ourselves, or how our parents or other important people see us – God sees us as his workmanship – wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14 “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

And as David goes on to say in the Psalm not just wonderfully made but created from the very start, known to God from before the very beginning of time and creation, and woven together in the womb with God watching over his creation. As we read in Ephesians…

Ephesians 2:10a “For we are God’s workmanship…”

Maybe that’s easy to see – if you’ve watched the program called “The Body” it’s hard to imagine how you can’t see. For many of us God creating and working his magic in this world is the only possible answer – the human body is just too amazing, as is the world and the universe. But there’s more to it than just our bodies, or the wonder of life.

Ephesians 2:10 “…created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

Whatever the opinion of this world, whatever we have been lead to believe about ourselves, good or bad, God says that having become his children in Jesus, having trusted in Christ for salvation and moved from being God’s enemies to being God’s friends, he has remade us in Christ so that we can now start to fulfil his original design. We were created from scratch to do good works that God prepared for us before we were even a twinkle in our parent’s eyes. This is about how we fulfil the mission God has given us – how the church fulfils its mission in this world. I like to use Ephesians 4 as a guide for the life of the church – not the only one but I really like this.

Ephesians 4:12-13 “to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.”

That’s God’s plan! And God has given us the means to carry it out – not one or two people able to fulfill his plans – but churches full. It is not the few who are wonderfully made and who are God’s workmanship – it is all – everyone – all creation. Every person is made to perfectly match God’s plans – in fact created in the image of God – made with purpose. So we read in 1 Corinthians…

1 Corinthians 12:1 “Now about spiritual gifts, brothers and sisters, I do not want you to be ignorant.”

Who is Paul writing to?

The whole church – the same as in Ephesians when he says we are God’s workmanship, the same in Romans when he says we have different gifts but one body. What does he says to the whole church about Spiritual Gifts?

1 Corinthians 12:2-3 “You know that when you were pagans, you were led astray to mute idols, however you were led. Therefore I want you to understand no one speaking in the Spirit of God ever says “Jesus is accursed,” and no one can say, “Jesus is Lord,” except in the Holy Spirit.”

What can we say about these Spiritual Gifts – without going further than the Scriptures do?

1.      Spiritual Gifts Are Given To Glorify God

Paul sets the stage by declaring that the purpose of Spiritual Gifts is to glorify God – especially designed to help us declare Jesus is Lord over all other gods – the mute idols that Paul talks about. The Corinthians came from a pagan, idol worshipping background, where spiritual utterances and demonic activity were par for the course – the cultic priests claimed all sorts of spiritual powers. The way to know that the spiritual gifts of the church are real – is by what they declare! No one speaking by the Holy Spirit can curse Jesus – no one speaking without God’s Spirit can declare Jesus as Lord. When the chips are down and life is threatened – you will only declare Jesus as Lord by the power of God.

The real evidence of God’s presence is not the gifts and the power that we so often seem to associate with the Spirit. The real evidence is Jesus proclaimed as Lord. Whatever takes away from the glory of God, whatever tears down or destroys the unity of the church, or damages the name of Jesus, even if it appears to be legitimately from God’s Holy Spirit – if it does not glory God and proclaim Jesus’ name then it has no place in the church. This is how we will know the work of the Spirit amongst us. As we start to learn about the gifts themselves we see…

1 Corinthians 12:4-7 “There are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit, and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord, and there are varieties of activities, but the same God empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.”

2.      Spiritual Gifts Are Given For The Good Of All

How will we know that the gifts we exercise are from God?

By their fruit!

1 Corinthians 12:7 “To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.”

Just as we know a good fruit tree when we see one – the product tells us everything we need to know.

It’s not that everyone has to have the same gifts, or start at the bottom and work your way up to the top of the gifts pile. In fact there is an array of gifts given to the church – everything we need to fulfill God’s plans of maturity and growth for us – that is His promise to us.

2 Peter 1:3 “God’s divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.”

So many people believe that faith is a private thing and that you don’t have to go to church to be a Christian. Nothing could be further from the truth – not least that you don’t stick a light in a cupboard – how useless is that? Why become a Christian with gifts from God for the good of his people – the church – and then not use them? Faith is not private – it’s designed to be shared with all, as scary as that may be at times. Together Christians make up the body of Christ – arms, legs, back, head, shoulders, feet, heart, lungs, eyes, nostrils, hair follicles –

1 Corinthians 12:12 “The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ.”

Together the body of Christ serves to strengthen and build up the whole body so that together the body matures. If there is one thing a body is designed to do it’s to work together for the common good. If your spleen goes on holidays for 6 weeks where does that leave you?

3.      Spiritual Gifts are given as God determines

1 Corinthians 12:8-11 “To one there is given through the Spirit the message of wisdom, to another the message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit – gifts of healing by that one Spirit – miraculous powers – prophecy – distinguishing between spirits – speaking in different kinds of tongues – the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he gives them to each one, just as he determines.

In distributing the gifts of the Spirit God doesn’t listen to the world. Thank God!!!! (And yes – I really do mean that). The criterion is not wealth or cleverness, how beautiful or wonderful we are, how much people like us or how famous we are. God has given every Christian gifts of the Spirit according to his plan and designs – just as he determines, as he decides.

The danger the church faced for many centuries was that they taught that it was the professionals who were gifted by God to serve in the church – the priests, the monks and nuns and so on. They alone did God’s work and the job of the congregation was to be obedient, to fill the pews and provide the cash (I now the time to take up the offertory??!) J And back then if you did get involved in ministry it was helping the priest or doing the flowers or the food or raising money through fetes, or distributing food to the widows or the needy – all good stuff but from the churches point of view back then – not the main game. Sadly we still see the same thing in some churches – it’s hard to imagine how they justify it when the Bible is so blatantly clear that God gives gifts to all Christians for service and ministry. Every part is as important as any other; every ministry and servant is important and valuable.

The Sleeping Giant

So “How do we wake a sleeping giant” – not the fee-fie-foe-fum variety – rather the largest company in the world, with combined income and numbers Bill Gates would sell his soul for?

You!

The church!

The company of believers!

Every survey I’ve ever seen on ministry by people in the pews – not the paid staff of a church – suggests that most churches have less than 20% of people involved in the ministry of the church – it’s called the 20/80 rule and as far as I can tell it’s a pretty good indicator not only of ministry but of money, energy, time, support. And that is a sleeping giant!

Why do people in the church not get involved?

Too tired, worn out, busy in work and family?

Too scared, or afraid of mistakes, too young, too old?

Too immature, done too much already, not enough work to do in the church, don’t know what to do, can’t find a spot to serve, never had the opportunity, never took the opportunity, was cut down when I took the opportunity – badly burnt by past experiences?

All these may be true in your life – but let me say they don’t stack up too well as excuses.

If someone gives you a gift for your birthday or Christmas – what do you do with it? If you don’t open it what value does it have – and what does that say to the giver? You can admire the paper, read the card, and rattle the box to work out what it is – but while it’s wrapped it’s basically meaningless. The only way to deal with a present is to open it and use it.

It’s the same with God and his church – he has given gifts to every single person who belongs to him – if you tick the box “Christian” – “follower of Jesus” then you also tick the box “gifted by God for his church”. So what are you doing with it?

If you answer “nothing” what’s going on? Do you not believe God? He says he has given gifts to every person who is a Christian. So is he right or not? Have you tried and failed? Cause if you have I bet you have also said to a child to get back on a bike after falling off, or back on the horse, or suggested (or just thought) someone should face their fears?! Have you been cut down or unappreciated? Has your minister or another leader had a go at you for getting it wrong or not being very good or for failing? If so – give them a boot in the backside from me and tell them to support you as you try rather than having a go at you when you fail. And if you want to do something and are scared then ask for prayer and support – from minister, family, friends… get some training, do a course, get some practice in with someone you can trust, start small, volunteer to assist someone else who is doing it, give it a go. And if you have no idea what your particular gifts may be then ask for help and make sure your minister or leader gives it to you.

Around the world the evangelical church is growing – slowly, but faster than most churches. But imagine what would be happening if every single Christian used their gifts from God for the benefit of the church. Imagine your own church with the 80/20 rule reversed – if every person was using what God has given us to serve his people.

Churches should bloom not by the ministers’ energy or strength – such as they are – but by the enthusiastic use of the gifts God has given us – churches should be so committed to God’s plan that nothing could stop us using what God has given us.

The church should be able to tattoo this to our foreheads – that we are a church that is preparing…

Eph 4:12-13 “God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.”

Thinking about Marriage and Divorce

Marriage Vows

Do you recognise these words?

We have come together in the sight of God, and in the presence of this congregation, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony; which is an honourable state of life, instituted from the beginning by God himself, signifying to us the spiritual union that is between Christ and his Church. Christ adorned and beautified matrimony with his presence, and with the first sign by which he revealed his glory; at the marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the Holy Scriptures command that all should hold it in honour.

It is therefore not to be entered upon unadvisedly, lightly, or merely to satisfy physical desires; but prayerfully, with careful thought, and with reverence for God, duly considering the purposes for which it was ordained.

• It was ordained for the procreation of children and that they might be brought up in the nurture and instruction of the Lord, to the praise of his holy name.
• It was ordained so that those to whom God has granted the gift of marriage might live a chaste and holy life, as befits members of Christ’s body.
• And it was ordained for the mutual companionship, help, and comfort that the one ought to have of the other, both in prosperity and adversity.

Into this holy manner of life these two have come now to be joined. Therefore if anyone can show any just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, let them speak now, or hereafter remain silent.

Most of us will have heard those words – or something similar – and many of us will have been on the receiving end, standing before the minister. It’s surely one of the biggest decisions we can make – right up there near giving our lives to Jesus.

But in our world marriage has become disposable, unnecessary and costly – you can always get a new one. We went to a 50^th wedding anniversary recently – my wife and I have been married 21 years – 50 still seems a way off – and it’s unusual to get an invite to a 50^th.

In 1976 Australia streamlined divorce proceedings making the only possible divorce a ‘no-fault’ divorce. Stay apart for a year, make the necessary application and fill out the forms and the marriage is history. There was an immediate spike in the divorce rate which took about 3 years to run its course and then things settled down. By 2000 the divorce rate was around 46% of all marriages. By 2007 this had dropped to about 40%. So for every 100 couples that get married, 40 get divorced. There’s a pile of other stats you can find – there is some evidence but little in the way of hard stats as yet that the 40% is actually a skewed number because a much higher percentage of 2^nd, 3^rd and so-one marriages fail – some analysts suggest as much as 65-75% of second marriages end in divorce.

http://www.abs.gov.au/AUSSTATS/abs@.nsf/0/947114F16DC7D980CA25773700169C64?opendocument

That’s what the world says about marriage!

What does the Bible says about marriage and divorce? What is God’s view?

God’s view of marriage

One flesh

Genesis 2:24 “…a man will leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”

In a nutshell this is God’s plan and summary of marriage – and at no point does the Bible move from this picture – both Jesus (Matthew 19:5) and Paul (Ephesians 5:31) use this verse as their authority for teaching on marriage – it would be fair to say this verse is normative for every marriage relationship regardless of time, country, Jew or gentile – this is God’s plan.

God’s view of marriage starts with one fact – that he designed it – just as he designed the world and us for his purposes. It’s not man-made – or woman-made institution which is what some blokes think – it really was ordained by God – and is designed for our good.

Marriage comes into the picture of Genesis when God sees that man is alone.

Genesis 2:18 “The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.””

Now let’s be clear – I’m only going to touch on the Bible’s teachings and I will leave some things out. Don’t take what’s said as a judgment against you or your choices – it may be that God is and you’ll have to deal with that – but I’m not.

For example – Genesis 2:18 is not saying that singles somehow don’t measure up to God’s plan. God loves and saves us as individuals – our value is due to his saving grace rather than our relationships. So don’t hear a condemnation of single-hood or even an elevation of marriage over being single. But I do want to think about marriage and divorce.

Marriage is God’s design. And the key to it is the “one flesh” idea – God’s design is an exclusive relationship on all levels – physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual – and the physical oneness, which may be the most obvious part of a relationship, points us to the complete unity of two people of the opposite sex.

Contract

The one flesh relationship is in all senses a contract – in God’s eyes a legally binding contract. I know that’s not very romantic – “would you agree to a life-long contractual relationship that is legally binding on both parties with a mutual benefit clause” – doesn’t really cut it against “will you marry me?”! But it might help us see the truth. This contract – we sign the papers, there are witnesses, promises and consequences for a broken contract – this contract is not just an agreement between two parties with a mutual benefit clause but a contract of ownership.

1 Corinthians 7:4 “The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.”

We have to be careful here. If you’re a bloke and you’re thinking this gives you permission to beat or abuse your wife – pull your head in. Abuse is not on – if you have abused then it’s time to repent and confess your sin, and don’t just confess in private, or just to your wife – abuse is a crime – so go to the police and admit what you’ve done! Any pastor or minister worth his salt will support you through that process – and mate if your wife is able to forgive you, you may end up with an amazing marriage – totally worth the price of admission.

But – getting back to 1 Corinthians – God is declaring and defending the exclusivity of marriage – there is no place for infidelity or adultery, and we can’t withdraw from our spouse. They say the wedding ring is a tourniquet – it stops circulation – that’s the point. I gave myself to my wife. We have this joke – what’s hers is hers and what’s mine is hers – when we were first married we’d go to McDonald’s and she wouldn’t order fries – but then she’d happily eat mine – I learnt to order two lots. But – truly – it’s no joke. I belong to her – I’m no longer free to give myself in any way to another woman. She is no longer free to give herself to another man.

Exclusive

We have to think of this more broadly than just sex. For some people marriage has proven not to be everything they hoped for.

• A wife might find a man that seems to really understand her – she gives herself to him – not sexually because she’s a Christian, but they talk, laugh and share like she never could with her husband.
• A Christian guy has a secretary who finds him attractive – they flirt – but nothing further.

Is it wrong? Where’s the line that guards the exclusivity of marriage? This is where Malachi’s helpful – it brings into the equation the idea of faithfulness. Israel has been the subject of God’s judgment and they were wondering why?

Malachi 2:14-15 “You ask, “Why?” It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.”

It’s not just sexuality – though that’s a bit of a dead give-away of unfaithfulness. Breaking faith is bringing into an exclusive relationship something that doesn’t belong – anything, not just sexual, but anything that damages or has the potential to damage the marriage bond. Bring it back to our relationship with God, which is the model for marriage. If we Christians were to chat up other gods – so to speak – if we flirted with worshipping them, never quite actively praising them or offering ourselves to them, but skirting the edges, putting ourselves in temptations way – would we be being faithful to God?

Exodus 20:2-3 “I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. “You shall have no other gods before me.”

You wouldn’t say to God “I’m yours but when I’m at work I like to spend a little time with Buddha – he understands my situation better – knew you’d understand.” Keeping faith means doing whatever it takes to actively protect marriage, for better or worse, in sickness and health, richer or poorer, until you get bored and give in? No – until death! So Paul says to the Corinthians…

1 Corinthians 7:3-5 “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

Don’t deprive each other – this is one area that constantly surprises me – the number of couples who have given up sex. Sometimes it happens through illness for example and that has to be dealt with. But if you are depriving each other of sex – and yes I realize how bluntly I’m speaking – you are breaking your marriage vows – God’s plan and command is that your marriage is an exclusive, life long, contract of one flesh, one mind, and one family, under him.

God’s view of divorce

So what about divorce? We can have all the excuses in the world, and I hear them every other day – incompatibility is the big one – we no longer love each other, we should never have been married, we don’t find each other attractive, we never have sex anymore, he’s not a Christian!

Let’s be blunt! An exclusive marriage contract between two people for life is an exclusive marriage contract between two people for life! Until death do we part! With blokes I often end up wanting to thump them when they come to me about divorce – what is it about the word “promise” we don’t understand?

This is what God say about divorce!

Malachi 2:16 “I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel, … says the LORD Almighty. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.”

We have managed, even in the church to get away from the directness and the bluntness of God’s view of divorce – “I hate divorce”. How do you read that any other way? Divorce goes directly against the good plans God has for us – the exclusive relationship – one flesh! In our world you can get divorced for no reason at all – and Christians have picked this up. As far as God is concerned – from the Bible – marriage in all circumstances is meant to be life-long.

Matthew 19:3-6 “Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

It’s not a free for all – get divorced for any and every reason. It is… “what God has joined together, man must not break apart.” Jesus gives one concession – and it is a concession.

Matthew 19:9 “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Concession

You may be the innocent party – where the other person has broken the marriage vows and severed the exclusive contract! And you find that you cannot live in that relationship anymore – then, and only then is divorce and remarriage permitted – not encouraged or commanded. In all other circumstances adultery and remarriage is sin. Now – we humans, we like rules, we want specifics – yes! We can get divorced if our spouse has had an affair. What about brutality, abuse, verbal abuse – what about being a bad father – being an alcoholic – what about “he’s an obnoxious ‘prat’ and I can’t imagine why I ever married him?”

Like the Pharisees we want our excuses to be given Gods’ approval. Christians will talk to their minister to get the minister to say “yes – I’m sure God approves!” But the mistake, surely, is looking for an excuse. God’s plan for our marriages is that we do everything and anything under God to preserve our marriage – and that we divorce only in the most drastic circumstances, where the other person has broken the one flesh nature of the marriage beyond repair. If we’re ferreting around for an excuse then that hasn’t happened – and our promise as Christians is “until death we do part.”

Two Facts

This is a huge topic and the Bible has a pile of stuff to say that would be beneficial. It’s also a very painful subject for many people – which is why we should stick to what God says. If you’ve been affected by divorce please understand I don’t want to make it worse, or judge you. And frankly I would say that the church has really dropped the ball when it comes to accepting and caring for divorced people – we either ignore it and God’s will, or we make it impossible to have fellowship. Madness!

But I also know this is an area Christians need to fix. Not a week goes by that I don’t spend hours dealing with people’s marriage problems, divorce and the pain – it takes up the largest part of my time, next to preaching. I keep coming back to the two facts of marriage as being the most important.

1. God hates divorce – full stop!

We must, as Christians, become extraordinarily slow in approving divorce and remarriage – if not then we will go beyond the provisions made by God for the breakdown of relationships and we might be approving people in their sinfulness. Yes – that does sound hard – but I would challenge you to think on Jesus’ words – how far does he go in allowing divorce?

2. God’s wonderful plan for us is that men and women will form “one flesh” relationships that last a lifetime – and they are worth every effort and any amount of pain to preserve and grow them.

Note:

• In the Old Testament the word divorce is related to the word for cutting down trees – divorce cannot happen without a huge amount of damage, without amputation of the one flesh.
• The word adultery means, “to break the one flesh”.

Disasters and God

9/11?

It was with morbid fascination we watched aircraft plough into NY’s Twin Towers. An outrageous act – how could anyone justify it in the name of god? It was appalling – 3000 dead – and it changed our world. 9/11 has new meaning – terrorism, aircraft security, air marshals, the war on terror. There are lingering fears about high-rise buildings.

Where was God?

Boxing Day 2004 – 237,000 dead or missing, in the aftermath of the Tsunami. Other disasters seem to pale into insignificance with those sort of numbers. 237,000 dead. That means in family terms 1-2 million immediately affected by lost loved ones. 5 million people displaced. How many people would be affected by your death – immediate family, extended family, family you don’t talk to very often, friends, colleagues, neighbours, workers in shops and stores you visit, school friends… how big a list. 237,000 dead – if you know 100 people that’s over 23 million affected in some measure by those deaths. 200 family and friends? Almost 50 million affected long term. And apart from human suffering – a $50 billion clean-up bill, 10-20 years to fix the disaster – psychological trauma, lost businesses and livelihoods, lost networks.

Where is God?

And in-between 2001 and now or 2004 and now – count the disasters. Just this year… earthquake and tsunami in Japan, earthquake in …, mudslide in … floods and cyclones in Queensland, NSW and Victoria,

Letter to the Editor

This bloke wrote to the Sydney Morning Herald in 2004, in the aftermath of the Tsunami.

As the scale of the tsunami tragedy unfolds I wonder just how all the religious people among us are going to explain it to themselves and to people like me. When I hear that 300 Sri Lankans were swept away to their deaths while praying in church I think I can be excused for being somewhat cynical about God’s benevolence. Yet the natural reaction of the faithful after an “act of God” is to flock back to church to praise Him.”

Clearly he is not alone in his thoughts or opinions – and I would say in response… fair question!

Is God proved dead?

Humanists and atheists tell us God’s not around. These events – these disasters are simply “Mother Nature” at her worst, or maybe part of the effects of global warming. It’s an opportunity to show how powerful we are, to make the world a better place. The environmentalists blame humans for it. Some Muslims have called it Allah’s act of vengeance – a judgement against man for ignoring the true and only god. Some Christians have done the same – they just mean a different God. Hindu’s call it the world’s Karma – it was meant to be. Buddhists say something similar. Truth is most religions have nothing to say – certainly no meaningful answers. And neither do the atheists or the environmentalists – the reasons they give are pathetic excuses by a world that simply doesn’t know why. In fact – they are the very opposite of the truth.

Is God proven dead by the disaster? Where is God?

Disaster

It’s a reasonable question – God’s existence, goodness and power? Each fresh disaster brings heated debate! People are afraid – the sheer scale of these disasters is overwhelming. It is devastation on a grand scale, in some case amongst some of the poorest nations on earth. In a country like Australia, the resources we can bring to bear on a disaster are astronomical. The $50 billion clean-up for the Boxing Day Tsunami – in Australia we would basically say “so what”! Yes – it’s a little painful – we’ve just seen the introduction of the disaster recovery levy – we all get to pay a little extra in tax. But – we have that capacity. We can find 50,000,000 dollars. And if it was more, or happened more than once – we could do it again. But in a 3^rd world country, or simply a poorer country – the numbers are basically incomprehensible.

And it shows the weakness of religion and atheism – both of which offer meaningless sayings and platitudes, or are simply reduced to helpless silence.

It’s shocking because there’s no sense to the destruction. Terrorism has a rhyme and reason and someone to blame. Natural disasters wreak havoc and destruction with no logic in who lives and dies. Christian, Muslim, child, adult, poor, rich, innocent and guilty – dead! No one to blame except maybe poor old “Mother Nature”.

If God exists, what’s he doing?

If he’s in charge why would he do such a cruel, undiscriminating thing? Isn’t he a God of love? And if he’s not in charge of nature, then what good is he? Does he look on helpless, sad but unable to intervene? Is he simply weak? Is he a tyrant punishing whoever he feels like punishing? Does he simply not care?

‘god’ Is Dead

Actually disasters do prove that god is dead!

Disasters should wipe away any pretence that the god the world believes in exists at all. The real God of the universe has been forgotten and in his place there is a vague, general religious feeling. We have domesticated and trivialised the true God. We have diluted his character and purpose with false religions, and even with false Christianity. We have turned Jesus’ life, death and resurrection into a sideshow – a child in a manger, a movie star – but mostly just an expletive – a common, foul mouthed, swear word.

And we think we‘re invincible.

In our country, we are well off. We are generally safe. War is relatively unknown to us in Australia. We take great offense when our soldiers travel overseas to fight and worse to die. It’s quite easy for us to think we’re the masters of the world. To us natural disasters are unique, strange – a natural disaster is almost an insult. The world is not meant to be like this; God is kind, God is safe and inactive. Disaster should only occur far away and not too big, where we do not have to explain or respond and so that our short attention span can allow us to forget what the world is really like. And even when it happens here in Australia, to us – well it’s an opportunity to band together, to demonstrate to the world what it means to be an Australian – and we should be proud as a country that we can and do help each other out – mateship is alive. But we do that rather than face the truth that disasters should bring us face-to-face with.

If you want reality – look to the Bible – and to experience. The theme of the Bible is that we are out step with the world because we are out of step with God. The Bible never considers the world to be safe and secure. From the Biblical flood (Noah and the Ark) onward – the whole assumption of Biblical faith is that we live in a fractured, dangerous world. We will frequently experience drought, flood, famine, earthquake, disease and pestilence. The normal relationship between man and nature is one of exploitation and pain.

The god of the world has no answers.

The God of the universe does.

Misunderstanding and Forgetting

My grandmothers both died a few years ago.

I read a story a few years back about four-year-old girl who died by choking on a pebble.

A few months ago a policeman was killed in the line of duty.

Just the other day another Australian soldier was killed in Afghanistan.

Every day we are reminded that death stalks us. But here’s the thing – why are the deaths of 237,000 people worse than the death of my grandmother, or a little girl, or a cop, or a soldier? Does the death of one person mean nothing but the death of thousands suddenly become proof that God does not exist?

The world is mistaken in thinking that a Tsunami, a flood, a cyclone or some other ‘natural’ disaster is the worst disaster to befall mankind. And mistaken too in thinking that the deaths of so many at once disproves the existence God. That argument is simply about scale – so many dying at once – God must not exist – it shocks us!

As shocking, and maybe terrifying as it is that so many can die at once – it’s really the death of individuals that matters.

And truth is – we forget so easily. We have the attention span of a goldfish when it comes to disaster. How many “innocents” have died from AIDS and HIV, smallpox, plague – from starvation and famine, drought, earthquakes, crime and murder? It is not the scale we should question – it’s the very existence of death, disease, crime, pain, sin, hunger, thirst, sadness, poverty – that these exist at all – that is where our questions should be directed.

• In WWI more that 250,000 Australian men died.
• In WWII 20 million Russians – we always think of the Jews murdered – and frankly we should never forget such atrocities – but we mostly do forget the 20 million Russians. We remember Hitler… we forget Stalin!
• Saddam Hussein murdered something like 20 million.
• Pol Pot, Stalin, Idi Amin, Gaddaffi – Iran, Iraq, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, South America, Rwanda, Bosnia, Chechnya – you want disaster on a grand scale? Pick a war.
• The great flu epidemic of 1919 – 40 million people.
• The Japanese earthquake in 1923 – 140,000!
• Earthquake in China – 242,000.
• 3 million have died in the Congo wars over the last decade.
• 20 million people right now are on the verge of starvation in the Horn of Africa.
• And let’s be honest – I haven’t touched the surface in recalling the disasters that we have seen in the last 100 years, let alone the rest of history.

We forget!

We ask the question but we don’t remember the disasters. Where is God?

Responding To Disaster

We Christians should probably be accused of failing to answer – many of us blindly accept God’s plan, or misunderstand it – and our answers are often less than helpful. Sometimes we raise as many questions as the world does, because we fail to answer from God’s Word. In all these disasters…

• Was God passing judgement on those people for their sins?
• Were they evil?
• Did they incur God’s wrath?
• Were they being judged for being Muslim or Hindu or for not being very good Christians – or for something else. Were they being judged for being – atheist or agnostic?

There are four things we need to understand if we are to make sense of our world.

1. The Sovereignty of God

Is God sovereign over all things? Is he good? Is he all-powerful? Is he a God of love? The answer is yes – yes – yes and yes! We’re not going to be able to see it clearly from the world – only from Jesus on the cross. It’s God who acted in the person of Jesus to defeat our enemies. Our world cannot explain sin let alone get rid of it. But we can. Sin is rejection of God and ignoring God and it kills us – because God is good he refuses to live with us as sinners. Yet he offeres us life in his presence for all e

ternity.

As the Bible tells us

– when we were still God’s enemies, Jesus destroyed sin’s hold and the power of death by dying to pay the price and rising again.

Is God powerful? Well

… God through Jesus dealt with the two enemies we have no power over. He destroyed the hold that sin had over us and he destroyed the anguish and certainty of death. Yes God is powerful.

1 Corinthians 1:24 “… Christ [is] the power of God and the wi

sdom of God.”

Jesus is the power, the wisdom, the love and the goodness of God in action.

Psalm 25:7-9 “Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you are good, O LORD. Good and upright is the LORD; therefore he instructs sinners in his ways. He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.”

2. The connection between sin and judgement?

Some Christians say that disasters are God’s judgements against sin. And it’s tempting I suppose to try to see that sort of sense behind it – but they are tragically mistaken. There are numerous instances of the link between specific sins and judgement under the Old Testament covenant – that was the agreement between God and Israel. But Jesus says this is no longer the case.

Luke 13:1-9 “Now there were some … who told Jesus about the Galileans whose blood Pilate had mixed with their sacrifices.Jesus answered, “Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans because they suffered this way? I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish. Or those eighteen who died when the tower in Siloam fell on them—do you think they were more guilty than all the others living in Jerusalem? I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish.”

Were any of the victims of any of the disasters being judged by God for their sin or unbelief?

Yes and no!

Yes in that they have perished and have faced the judgment seat of God.

But no also – the disasters are not sent by God to destroy those who are “more evil”. We need to be very clear. Jesus is asked about some Jews killed at the Jewish altar as they were making sacrifices for their sins – so good, upright, faithful or at least religious Jewish folk. Their blood mingled with the sacrifices, contaminating the sacrifices and making them worthless. Were they worse sinners than everyone else, being judged by God? Absolutely not! Nor were the 18 who died when a tower fell on them. Specific sin and judgment are not linked directly. If you go and sin right now God will not strike you down because of that specific sin.

But – and this is the chilling part, the part the world fails to notice…

Luke 13:5 “unless you repent, you too will all perish.”

3. The reality of judgement?

Zephaniah 1:14-18 “The great day of the LORD is near—near and coming quickly. Listen! … That day will be a day of wrath, a day of distress and anguish, a day of trouble and ruin, a day of darkness and gloom, a day of clouds and blackness,… I will bring distress on the people and they will walk like blind men, because they have sinned against the LORD. Their blood will be poured out like dust and their entrails like filth. Neither their silver nor their gold will be able to save them on the day of the LORD’s wrath. In the fire of his jealousy the whole world will be consumed, for he will make a sudden end of all who live in the earth.”

The day of God’s judgment is very real. In each disaster did the people die because of some terrible sin?

No!

Did they die and face judgment for the way they lived and how they responded to Jesus?

Yes!

Sin and judgment are directly linked. If you don’t want to face the judgment of God and perish then repent of the sinful life. However your life is taken from you – a massive “natural” disaster, terrorist attack, a car accident unnoticed by the media, dying alone and senile in a hospital bed – whether the world reels in horror at your death or simply doesn’t notice – if you die unrepentant of your sins then you lose.

God has said clearly that His wrath against sin will consume all who do not belong to Jesus. We must not water down judgement – nor minimise the day of judgement that is coming. We can take God at his word – in the great disasters it is not the scale of the disaster that is at issue, but the death of many individual – and in each disaster every-one who has died has been judged.

Revelation 20:12-13 “… I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had done as recorded in the books. … each person was judged according to what he had done.”

But we also know – as sure as judgment is for all people – Jesus offers hope in the face of disaster. Disaster is meant to be a warning to those left – not that more will come or that life is fragile but that God takes life when he chooses – and he chooses who will survive. He demands our response – turn back to God, repent of our sins and live. Jesus tells a parable…

Luke 13:6-9 “Jesus told this parable: “A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, ‘For three years now I’ve been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven’t found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?’ ”‘Sir,’ the man replied, ‘leave it alone for one more year, and I’ll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.’”

Every day, every month, every year that we don’t die is a day, a month or a year more in which to produce fruit for God – that is to turn back from our sins and receive life at God’s hands. If we bear the fruit of repentance – if our lives are shown to be faithful in Jesus then we will not be cut but will live. We will receive all that Jesus offers – life, safety, hope, peace and freedom.

How to explain it to non-Christians?

1 Corinthians 1:18 “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”

In helping others see the truth we have to recognize that the vast majority of the human race will think we are fools – hopeless, blind children. You can hear it in their words…  “…the natural reaction of the faithful after an “act of God” is to flock back to church to praise Him.”

When you stand up for Jesus people will think you’re a moron. When you stand up for Jesus in the face of a disaster – they will think much worse. But some will believe.

John 1:10-13 “He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.”

The fact is they killed Jesus when he told the truth. Yet a few believed – and 2000 years on – a few still believe. Do you want to know how to explain it to non-Christians?

Tell them the truth and pray for them. We are not responsible for how people believe.

1 Corinthians 3:6-7 “I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow.”

God makes them grow.

What we must do however is live the task of faith. In Paul’s words…

Acts 20:24 “…I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God’s grace.”

We who already believe must tell people the truth – that Jesus died and was raised again so that even in the face of a massive disaster we might have hope for all eternity.

And pray for them, faithfully day after day – that God by His Spirit would move them to see the truth clearly and repent of their sins.

Some will believe.

Competing With God – Money and Generosity

Duty, Scraps and Little Expectations

A friend’s dad used to come to church at Christmas – every year – he was very religious. And he thought that he should support the church. He was well off – not a Packer or Murdoch, but he had plenty. When the plate came around he would drop in 50c. He deliberately came to church without notes – he felt it was his duty to give money to the church once a year, but only what he wouldn’t miss – the scraps.

Big John was a great guy – the sort of bloke that would make a fat guy feel positively slender – big hearted too. He was a commercial banker – nicely set up with all the trappings. He said to me one day…

“God doesn’t want me to deprive my family so he doesn’t expect me to give more than I can spare. That’s right, isn’t it?”

He is a Christian, generous to his family, gifted, faithful, hardworking, and good at witnessing the gospel. I have seen him in action and especially amongst men at church he was a gifted evangelist.

Was he generous towards God – absolutely not!

• Where does generosity come into our relationship with God?
• What does it mean to be generous towards God?
• How has God been generous to us?

Lifestyle Religion

Malachi was the last book of the OT to be written – about 450 years before Jesus – and it summarises Israel’s relationship with God, gives God’s assessment – have they lived according to the covenant – have they been God’s people living God’s way in God’s land. That’s the question. The answer is not just a resounding NO!

Malachi 3:7 “Ever since the time of your forefathers you have turned away from my decrees and have not kept them. Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the LORD Almighty. “But you ask, ‘How are we to return?’

Israel simply refused to live by the covenant for any length of time. They were just ordinary people – not particularly bad, not particularly good – just like us except they were Jewish and most of us aren’t. Many of them probably wanted to serve God faithfully, to be obedient – in the same sense that we see today –Christians generally want to be faithful. But Israel had a problem.

Malachi 3:14 “You have said, ‘It is futile to serve God. What did we gain by carrying out his requirements and going about like mourners before the LORD Almighty?”

Their problem was obedience and repentance – or rather a lack of!

Negative Equation

They looked at the world and said…

Obedience + repentance = 0

Doing God’s will, repenting of sin – gets you nowhere. The rich get richer at the expense of the poor. The arrogant are happy, evildoers prosper and escape God’s wrath. So they followed the nations. They wanted what other people had – security in an insecure world, security they could touch, taste, hold and be sure that it was real. They wanted love, and justice, fairness, romance, health, wellbeing, prosperity, enjoyment, safety, and peace. And they decided to get them through money and by calling God a stupid fool.

Foolishness

See, what they said was ‘evil people prosper and get ahead’. The part they didn’t say – but obviously believed – was that God was either wrong or stupid. The world doesn’t work the way God says it does. God says ‘hang on – take a step back from your sin? Give me glory and honour – obey me, be my special possession as you agreed to be – and then you will see the difference.’

Malachi 3:18 “And you will again see the distinction between the righteous and the wicked, between those who serve God and those who do not.”

But Israel wanted to see a difference that didn’t exist. They wanted God’s blessing even though they were exactly the same as the evildoers – there was no discernable contrast between Jew and pagan. Be mine says the Lord, be absolutely my people – be discernibly different and then you will see the difference.

Money

In their relationship with God they had given up everything that had any meaning and were simply doing the religious bits and pieces. And one of the clearest indicators was with their money. This is so often the truth with the people of God – what you do with your money says volumes about your faith. The Jews thought that money would get them ahead. They saw the locusts devour the crops, the thieves steal and storms destroy, they saw the taxman and the banks taking more and more and their superannuation destroyed by downturns in the market and they said to themselves, “I have to stop giving to God so that my family can live.” And they did – they gave up the tithes and offerings.

What do you think God said to them?

“Look guys – sure – yeh – no worries – no problem, I understand. Times are tough, I know it’s all been a bit hard – heaven’s been a little tight too – there have been cutbacks you know – so look, that’s fine.”

You know what God says to Israel?

Malachi 3:8-98 “Will a man rob God? Yet you rob me. “But you ask, ‘How do we rob you?’ “In tithes and offerings. You are under a curse—the whole nation of you—because you are robbing me.”

Israel responded to God’s generosity with disobedience and a lack of generosity.  They weighed up faithfulness and financial security and money won. Their interests and security had to come before God. They thought they had to provide every good thing, that they were responsible for prosperity, that they had to make a name for themselves, to protect themselves against locust, thieves, storms, disaster – have you ever tried to stop a swarm of locusts? They decided that it was up to them to provide generous blessings for themselves.

At this point there should be big flashing neon signs saying “Danger” “Danger” “Danger”.

Lifestyle

How different are we from Israel? We are God’s people living God’s way for eternity in God’s kingdom – by the death and resurrection of Jesus – the new covenant. We are not Israel, we don’t have a regimented lifestyle religion, we don’t live in Palestine, nor has God ever promised any such thing. But like Israel our lives are meant to conform to God’s will. We are to worship God, to walk in Jesus’ footsteps, to live by the Spirit, to grow closer to Jesus day by day, to fellowship with each other, to do specific things when we gather, to support and care for each other, to witness the truth of the gospel even to the point of death. It’s not a matter of rules and regulations but our entire lifestyle is to be a reflection of what we will be for eternity – God’s people living God’s way in God’s kingdom – by the death and resurrection of Jesus. For all eternity we will be focused solely on praising God in word and action – shining lights sharing in Christ’s glory.

Modern Society

But right now we live in a society obsessed with money and possessions, and the temptation for us is to see a hostile world, to see its dangers and difficulties and to bunker down – to protect our assets and build for the future. That is what the world encourages us to do – at every turn, if we are to be productive members of our society then we must strive for security, for the money and possessions that will free us – and we have bought the message so fully that we think God agrees with our aims! We think it is righteous to withhold from God – we think God agrees with the worlds view of cash!

But God says that we are in the greatest danger – danger of robbing him – danger of responding to his generosity without generosity – of being like Israel bunkered down, relying on themselves and their wealth, trusting their ability, giving glory to themselves and lacking generosity towards God.

The question is – what to do?

God says “be generous as I am generous” – but what does that mean?

I guess we could do what Israel did – look for rules – how much should I give to God in $$$ terms or % terms? The Pharisees of Jesus’ time gave 10% of everything they produced, including the herbs on their kitchen window – they had rules, hundreds of rules to regulate what generosity to God meant. I know for myself that is my temptation as well – to look for rules in my giving. I was brought up with the idea that 10% was a good starting place – I’ve hardly questioned that principle in my life. Even now as I write it bounces to the surface – if only people in the church would all give 10% the church would be loaded – ministry would progress, evangelism abound… (just leave aside the little element of self-righteousness that threatens to creep into my thoughts).

But God isn’t interested in how much! God is not interested in how much money – or time, fellowship, worship, praise, prayer, possessions, love, care – or money. There are no quantities being bandied around in the heavenly realms – quotas and targets. No – not how much… but rather God’s interest is how will we respond to God’s overwhelming and outrageous generosity?

You know what must have stuck in God’s throat with Israel? God promised them everything – their heart’s desires. In fact God was the only way they would ever have their hearts desires. And he came through – when they were obedient and repentant they received everything with abundance. Did they respond with gratitude – did they respond in kind? No! They said – “Wow, look at what we’ve done. Look at what we have built for ourselves – look at how rich I am – I did it my way – I better make sure that I protect it – that is the most important thing.”

And you thought they were different to us?!

How should they have responded?

With cheerful generosity! To say to God “You’ve given us everything we need and desire – can we give back to you.” To say to God “I will trust in you to fulfil your promises because you hold out the things I want and need.”

Look – the reality is no different for us. All the things we desire are found in Jesus – he offers us love, security, peace, hope, life, esteem – everything we really want, the things we seek. How should Israel have responded to God’s generosity? How should we respond? When we look at our little world – our home, possessions, education, superannuation, family, kids and grandkids, friends, holidays, leisure, our plans for the future, our marriage, our church and church friends here, the lifestyle that we have – do we look at all that, do we survey our domain and say “look at what I have done for myself”? Or do we say “thank you God”. Do we say, “I did it my way” – or with cheerful generosity, do we say to God “You have given us everything we need and desire. I will trust in you to fulfil your promises because you hold out the very things I want and need. How can I be generous towards you Lord?

Reality Check

Here’s the thing – I know lots of churches struggle to exist. But I do wonder why? Why are finances always an issue? It makes sense if there is real growth and the money just keeps outstripping the demand for ministry – that’s a nice problem to have. But for lots of churches that’s not the case. Why are the finances in constant trouble? Is it that there are not enough people earning enough money? Is it that we don’t give enough as individuals? Is it that churches spend the money unwisely? Is it that budgets are too adventurous or simply wrong?

As I look back at Israel it strikes me that when they did not prosper it was because as individuals and as a nation they refused to be generous to God!

There could be all sorts of reasons why churches lack sufficient funds – but if what the Bible says is true about money and generosity… if we will respond to God’s generosity with generosity then we will lack nothing – God will provide far above our desires and even our imaginations.

It’s a hard question isn’t it – it hits home pretty hard, right into every aspect of our lives and our families. But hear me on this – it’s not a matter of how much we give, or don’t give. Rather it’s a matter of living by God’s principles as we deal with money.

Principles of Generosity

I’d like to suggest three Biblical principles about money and possessions. This is not everything – just a part.

1 Timothy 6:17-19 “Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life.”

Paul says… don’t be arrogant about wealth, don’t put your hope in wealth, do hope in God (the provider), do good with the cash, be rich and generous towards others (probably speaking about those in the church), lay up heavenly not earthly treasures, take hold of real life not the falsehood of money. And… it’s also ok to enjoy what God has provided.

Three Principles?

• Be generous.
• Don’t assume responsibility for what God has done.
• Set your hopes on God.

We can bunker down all we like in the face of trouble. We can fear for our financial security and hoard and store and protect OUR assets for all we are worth. But none of it matters an ounce should God decide to alter our perspective. None of it’s worth a drop should we be found in the end to have been trusting in riches. It’s true for individuals and for churches.

God is the one who provides. God is the one who gives us generously out of his great wealth – if you have wealth of any sort – in fact if you have anything at all, it has come from his generosity. We falsely assume responsibility for our position in the world and in society when God is the one who gives and can take away. If you are hoping in your riches – your hope is entirely misplaced.

God says… don’t hoard and protect – don’t bunker down in the face of trouble.

He says “Try and beat me at being generous.”

Try and be more generous to me…
than I can be towards you…
and see who wins!

Money & Church

Christians don’t like it when ministers talk about money and generosity. Maybe you feel churches should focus elsewhere rather than on money and giving. I’d say the opposite – I can’t think of a more appropriate place than church gatherings to be asking myself (again and again) “How am I responding to God’s generosity?” If I am God’s person, living God’s way in God’s kingdom for all eternity because of the tragic death and the incredible resurrection of Jesus Christ then how will that affect my cash? For no other reason than God’s gracious love, he gave his son to take my place in death so that I might live.

We talk about the wonder and joy of Christmas – do you know the truly amazing thing about Christmas?

It’s not that Jesus was born as a baby boy!

But that he was born at all – that God acted generously towards me and you by providing his one and only Son as the sacrifice for our sins.

Do you think there will ever be a day that you can be more generous than God has been towards us? Out of that outrageous act of kindness God gave us life – life that is without limit, life that is full of every good thing, life full of everything I need and all my hearts true desires. How can we respond to God’s generosity by living generous lives towards God?

Some Questions for Thought and Discussion

Think/Discuss

1. What is your attitude towards money? Especially – what is your attitude towards giving money to God?
2. How did you decide what to give?
3. Where did your understanding about God and money come from?

Read 1 Timothy 6:17-19

1. Is your hope in God or your wealth and financial standing?
2. How would your friends and family answer that question about you?
3. What does hope in wealth look like in day to day life?
4. How are you using your money to lay up treasures in heaven?

Read: 2 Corinthians 9:6-11

1. Can a lack of growth in maturity, converts and the church be linked to a lack of generosity towards God?
2. If the harvest is small – does that mean we have put too little in?
3. If we lack anything we need does that mean we have not been generous to God?

Think & Pray: How can my church use the money God has given to proclaim the gospel? What will it take to convert those we live amongst?

Action: What actions do you need to take regarding money? Who do you need to speak to this week about Jesus?

A Welcoming Church 3

Ten Commandments – Front Line Welcoming

1. You get one chance to make a first impression – so make it a good one.
2. Visitors are honoured guests – so they should get VIP treatment. They are not intruders – they are an opportunity for us to express Christ’s love.
3. Remember the environment and the people are all strange to them. Visitors may feel apprehensive, especially getting morning tea after the service.
4. Members must go out of their way to speak to visitors, be prepared to chat for some time. Look after them introduce them around. Don’t leave them stranded. Hi and good bye are simply not enough.
5. Take the newcomer at their pace. Don’t embarrass them, don’t be pushy – be warm and friendly but let them enter the community at their own pace – fast or slow.
6. Wear a nametag – they don’t know and won’t remember your name. Does your church have a system where you can quickly generate a name tag for the visitor? Should do and it should look the same as everyone elses.
7. Generally people want to meet the minister – so create an opportunity after the service and introduce them. If there is time before the service and the minister obviously has time (not always true) then before is OK too. However don’t introduce and leave – you have become their new best friend for the day – stick around or arrange someone who can.
8. The minister is one person and cannot do it all – even ½ is beyond him or her. They will have lots of people wanting to have a chat and pass on news.
9. A warm welcome is stage one only. To incorporate the newcomer takes time and energy.
10. People visit churches for all sorts of reasons – but they stay mainly for one – relationships.

What to say after you say “hello”?

• People like to talk about special interests.  The BIG clue is to ask questions that call for more than a simple “yes” or “no” response – you want to get them talking rather than answering questions.
• Invent your own interest style, taking care not to pry and always being alert that some people have hurts – a recent death, divorce, depression – that make them vulnerable. How you listen and show interest is important.
• Learn by heart a couple of special questions that you find helpful.

People often like to talk about

1. Their family, their children or their children’s school – “I noticed you had a couple of kids with you this morning…? – Where do they go to school, what are their names, what grades are they in, how do they enjoy school, what sports do they play…?”
2. The street they live in and how long – “How long have you lived in … street?”
3. Why they chose your particular Church – “It was great you could join us this morning – how did you find out about the church?”
4. A special interest? – “I noticed you had a Bulldogs jersey – are you into football?”
5. Pets and pet topics (theirs not yours)
6. Some major world event – but avoid the gory and the political – Try “The … disaster was sad for everyone?” or “How will the world cope with these major oil spills?” or “Have you been watching the cricket… Rugby World Cup… Olympic Games…

Things to Avoid

1. “Are you new here?” You’re bound to get someone who has been coming for years but is not overly active in the church – and in my experience they will get offended! Better to say, “I don’t think we know each other?” or “I don’t think we’ve met before – my name is…”. And don’t do what I did once – said that to the same person at three separate meetings over 4 months! Oops. Pay attention.
2. “Who are you?’  This is blunt and often means “What do you do?” Job questions are better kept for further into a conversation – and the reality is we probably don’t really care what they do yet – when we get to know them we might but early on it’s a copout conversation piece.
3. Leaving people in the lurch – if you’ve welcomed them make sure they have people to talk to, food in their hands and a cuppa. If no one else is available to talk then you’re on deck. And don’t cut and run. Once you’ve introduced them, keep watch, rescue them if need be, rescue others if need be. If they get involved in a conversation that’s obviously fine, but they are just getting a feel for the place so help them get around a little and when you leave come back.
4. A question that is not from the heart. Ask, showing you want to listen. People can generally pick a phoney a mile away – except for real estate agents and car salesmen. So ask questions that you are willing to listen to the answer to – and then listen. Don’t listen with an ear to what you’re going to say, or trying to hear what your friends are saying – listen with your ears and eyes… with your attention firmly focussed on them. Be attentive!
5. The quick talk to just do your duty.
6. Quickly moving to animated and lively interaction with close friends. Rather – introduce your new contact to your circle and continue to make him/her feel comfortable. You can ring your friends later, have a meal with them and catch up – and most visitors won’t stick around for hours anyway. Spend 15 minutes in their company and unless you’re a fruit loop in all likelihood they will return next week – because they connected with a human who cared.
7. The uncomfortable – allow space and personal differences – if they express opinions that differ to yours does it really matter. Even theological issues don’t all have to be resolved within the first 5 minutes. If they are a non-Christian then it’s not their differing theology that matters – it’s their stand against God that matters – we can deal with the other things later.

Always

1. Leave the conversation with a bright note and if possible connect him/her to another face, another ministry, or another interest.
2. Leave a latch, a key to further interaction
• “See you next week?” Await a response!
• “Can I phone you?”  Take the phone number
3. If they have an interest in something particular; “Bob Jones can help you here. How about I introduce you to him – or I could get him to give you a call in the next couple of weeks?” Get an address and/or phone number if at ease.
4. Be committed to follow up. If you say you will then do what you say.

Caution: Genuine interest in new faces is the crucial missing ingredient in many churches. Will you be genuine?

Always talk to a new face or someone you don’t know well before linking up with your friends.

Some Final Ideas

1.            Generosity is the key.

• You really want to involve this new face in your church, your life, and your circle of friends.
• You want to share yourself and your friends.
  • You don’t? Leave welcoming to someone else.

2.            Take the initiative.

• Newcomers need to be welcomed on the spot with a smile and an outstretched hand – “Good to see you here.”
• Give that person the V.I.P. Treatment and remember to smile at regulars.
• Ever felt left out? Initiative is often the quickest cure. You can be a self-starter.

3.            Listen.

• Answer questions asked directly.
• Observe the body language.
• Accept the person just as he or she is.
• Learn some starter questions and give the newcomer the opportunity to talk.
• Your prompts are best taken from your interest in what the newcomer is saying.
• Three wise words  “Listen, Listen, Listen.”

4.            Assume nothing.

• “If you ASSUME… you may make an ASS of U and ME.”
• Your newcomer could be the most important new face in your church God has sent this year – so don’t assume someone else will say hello. Don’t assume the person wants to be alone – they’ve come to church for friendship and welcome as much as for God’s word. If they are a non-Christian they may not know why they are here.
• He/she needs your care

Some Final Hints

People basically like people.
People like to be liked.
People matter to God.
Be creative and a listener to the visitor.
Know what your church offers.

A Welcoming Church 2

A Biblical Basis for Welcome!

One of the reasons – maybe the prime reason – why we study the Bible is that it reveals to us aspects of God’s character.  As we consider his characteristics – what he is like, how he acts and speaks – and as we begin to try to be like him, that can truly affect the way we think, act and live towards others.

Whilst one verse is hardly a summary of the Scriptures, John 3:16-17 shows us the great reality of God’s plan revealed in the Bible…

John 3:16-17 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”

In other words when we were incapable of moving towards God – he took the initiative, at great cost to himself, to rescue us and draw us back to himself.

Romans 5:8 “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

There’s a song that was around in the 80’s – we don’t use it much anymore – it went like this;

Father welcomes all his children
To his family through his Son.
Father giving his salvation,
life forever has been won.”
(© Ring of Praise)

Or maybe better is the parable of the prodigal son – which really we should rename as the parable of the forgiving or welcoming father.

Have a read of Luke 15:11-32. For a searchable online Bible go to http://www.biblegateway.com/

What we find at the end of the parable is the father waiting for the son – in fact going out each day to look for and wait for him – it’s not really about the son who was foolish but about the father representing God the Father – his love and welcome for all who turn away from their sin and turn to him – who say with the son “I am not worthy to be called your son”… only to have the father forgive and welcome us into the fullness of life in his house.

Take a look at the following passages and consider what they say about welcoming – what does each passage tell us about God’s character, what commands or exhortations are there, how might you apply them today, practically in your church?

Leviticus 19:33-34; Luke 14:12-14; 15:1-7; Hebrews 13:2; Matthew 11:28-29; 25:31-46; Mark 9:36-37; 1 Peter 4:8-10; Acts 28:30-3; Romans 12:9-16

Pragmatic Reasons Why Welcoming Is Essential?

1. It is a sign that points people to the gospel. Our God is a welcoming God. When we warmly and lovingly welcome people we demonstrate God’s love and point them to Jesus.
2. People going into new and unfamiliar situations feel anxious and need to be put at ease. Have you ever been to a function where you knew no one – say a wedding or Christmas party? People attending church are in a very unfamiliar setting – even if they are used to the church they are not used to your church.
3. Today’s society is highly mobile – 17% of Australians move every year, a further 39% move every 5 years. In churches it is not uncommon to find that 50% of the current members have been in the church for less than 5 years (NCLS). These people are looking not just for Christian input and fellowship but also for friendship and community. The same thing applies when people have other major changes in their lives – baby’s, marriage, moving, death, illness and hospitalisation, a job change or unemployment – all of these can open people up to be receptive to new ideas and new commitments. Often we find people in these circumstances rocking up to church.
4. Each generation seeks different things – though that’s probably far too general a statement. For example, Gen X are apparently becoming disillusioned with the results of the ‘me’ generation – and many are revisiting old values – including the church. Denomination doesn’t matter – warmth, friendliness, relevance and ‘style’ do matter. They ask first “what will I get out of this for me?” before they ask any other question – does it meet their needs, and their families’, is it life affirming and positive. This is the supermarket generation – they shop around. Baby boomers might stick it out, Gen X may not. (This requires far more teasing out than one brief paragraph – but it’s worth understanding generational differences to consider what they are looking for in a church.)
5. Churches grow from newcomers if they have good systems for not only accessing new people but also of welcoming them into the life of the church and helping them be and feel included. This sort of church asks questions like “What does it feel like to come here if you’ve never been before?” or “How can we make what we say or do more accessible to the non-churched person?” This means thinking outside of our own needs and desire – especially for comfort and the security of a non-changing environment and seeking the good of others.
6. Broken relationships are affecting more and more people in our community – divorce, separation, abuse, and family breakdowns. The whole concept of ‘family’ has changed to accommodate the vast proportion of people who do not conform to the standard pattern of 50 and even 20 years ago. All this is a good thing – because the church is the community of the broken;

Matthew 5:3-6 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

We tend to forget! The church is not for the beautiful and rich but for the people who know they aren’t!

Welcoming – Sunday Services

We have a tendency to see welcoming as a small job – maybe the problem is the word ‘welcoming’. It’s far too limited when it is trying to describe one of the largest and most important ministries in the church. Welcoming is front line ministry – how people are greeted and dealt with as they arrive and on subsequent days and weeks is all-important. We want them to come here – we want them to hear the gospel and be converted, we want them to grow and to mature with us. Our task is to…

• Welcome
• Invite
• Integrate

…new members into the life, joy and ministry of this church. This is especially true if they’re from the local community and the suburbs where we live and serve, or they have some connection with the church.

Welcoming is also more than those who are rostered on. I think every church needs welcomers rostered on. I guess we might call them ushers and greeters – they hand out books and literature, field questions, direct people to services and amenities and take up the collection. But welcoming is every active member’s task every week, and must be more than those who are rostered on if we want to really welcome people into our church community.

Important Steps to Welcoming

1.            Understand that welcoming – the role you have as a welcomer (whether rostered on or not) – is a vital ministry.

In which case we should be praying for the ministry we do and being prepared for it, spiritually and physically. Do you pray that you will have opportunities to welcome people and introduce them to your church? This is a Christian Ministry role – like all others we should have people committed to reading their Bibles and praying in the role. So how’s your spiritual walk going? Have you dressed appropriately for the task and for your church? Showered and shaved (blokes) or whatever it is you need to do to be attractive – you represent not only the church but also the gospel. Do you see the task as an important one worth spending time and energy on?

2.            Apply the BELL principle – Be Early, Leave Late – and be prepared.

Have a good rest the night before so that you’re not tired and grumpy at church (this is good advice in any case). Be early enough to get ready – books and papers in place and ready to catch everyone who comes in. and preparation means more than just the right things to hand out. Come early enough to clean up anything that is messy; arrange chairs or whatever is required, to get things in order, to find out what needs to be handed out. Early enough that you can set yourself and your family up in whatever position you wish to have and are ready for church yourselves.

3.            When people start arriving – old or new faces – be welcoming.

Seriously – it’s not that hard. A smile, a kind word, a joke (not at their expense), a firm but gentle handshake – all good stuff. But more than that – be aware of the people. Who are they – why are they here – who have they come with – are they locals or not, visitors or checking out the church? People come with all sorts of reasons uppermost in their minds and hearts. Some will come because a loved one has died and they don’t know what else to do – so how we greet that person will make a big difference. Problem is you can’t know – but you can be sensitive and watching. (See list below of some of the reasons people might walk in the door).

4.            With newcomers and visitors our task is to make them feel welcome and comfortable.

It’s the task of the gospel to make them feel uncomfortable. So they need somewhere to sit, a drink maybe, to know where the toilets and kitchen are. If they have children they need to know about Sunday school, crèche and the parent’s room. Even more important they need to know that their kids are welcome – so tell them. And not just tell them but welcome and pay attention to the kids as much as the adults. A kind word about kids will have a positive effect 1000’s of times greater than any other comment. A kind conversation to kids (not down to!!!!) will provide an incredible welcome. People love it when you acknowledge their children as worthwhile and valuable enough to talk to!

• Offer to escort people to an appropriate seat – not right down the front, nor directly in the centre. They may refuse the help – but it’s unlikely. The best places for new comers are the sides and rear – not against the wall and not right at the back but in the congested areas. Try to seat them with similar people if you can – and introduce them to people who can look after them. After an appropriate time, you can say something like; “I’ll leave you in the capable hands of John” and then you can go do other things. Don’t dump them and run – you’re the only familiar face they have so far and John could be a mass murderer for all they know.
• Offer them coffee and tea if it’s on before church. (If you want to get people to church early – put on great coffee and tea for people to pick up before church. What a great thing to be able to sit and relax at church with a cuppa before church starts!)
• Point out where the toilets and facilities are.
• Offer them the church literature – newsletter, brochures etc – gives them something to read in the sermon J!
• Ensure you give them a communication card and pencil – ask them if they would fill that in so the leadership team can contact them during the week just to say hi. (What do you mean your church has no communication card?)
• It can be worth pointing out the minister – ministers – but only if it fits in. You could say something like “Have you met our minister? That’s him with all the grey hair – if you like I could introduce you after church?” Easy!

5.            After the service it’s important to go back to them.

Ask them how they liked the service etc and ask them if they’d like to meet the minister. In almost all cases they will say yes – so set it up. But don’t cut and run – introduce them (use their names) and stick around so that the minister can move on without abandoning them.

6.            Make sure that they aren’t left totally lost and alone.

Especially getting morning tea/supper. It can be daunting getting to the coffee and tea – especially if you have people who are not intent on welcoming newcomers, so they stand and chat to the servers and get in the way. Help newcomers out. Offer to get them a cuppa, or to beat a path for them. Make sure they get something to drink and eat – the kitchen helpers will know where extra food is if it has run out.

7.            Try to notice they are leaving.

Recognition is a big deal – people want to come and be recognised as having value – including the fact that we enjoyed meeting them and look forward to seeing them again next week. If you’re not standing with them then pay attention to what they are up to and break off your own conversation and farewell them properly. Offer them your phone number and name if they have any questions during the week.

8.            Contact them during the following week.

Here’s where welcoming starts on the road to invitation and integration. If you’ve been welcoming on the weekend and struck up a bit of a repour with someone then the very best thing you can do is to contact them, either by phone or mail, just to say how enjoyable it was to meet them and to offer them your expertise in joining in with the life of the church – if you don’t feel like an expert then imagine how they feel.

In many churches this is done by the staff. Ask yourself – would you prefer a staff member (who gets paid to do his/her job) to contact you – or the person who was so friendly towards you (who doesn’t get paid but thought it would be nice to follow up anyway)? People expect the ministry team to make contact – and it’s worthwhile. What they don’t expect – and this will be a nice surprise – is that the people in the congregation care enough to make the effort as well.

• It doesn’t have to be the phone conversation version of ‘war and peace’ – just a simple call to say that we noticed you and want to recognise you as valuable. For example;
• “Hi John – it’s Peter from …………… Church – we met on Sunday morning. I just wanted to catch up with you and say if there was anything you needed or you wanted to ask anything just to give me a call. I hope you/am glad… you enjoyed the service. It would be great to see you and your family again next Sunday – our new assistant will be preaching and he’s pretty good…” etc!
• Now the conversation might go on or it might not – it doesn’t really matter – what matters is that you – a real person rather than a minister has taken the time to call.

Stay tuned for Welcoming 3

A Welcoming Church 1

Making Church Welcoming

Every church thinks of themselves as open and welcoming to outsiders. It’s one of those ‘strengths’ that crops up whenever a church does a SWOT analysis – and from what I’ve seen it takes a pretty honest church to even contemplate that they may not be as open as they think. I guess we think naturally that being a Christian means being open to others – and if we enjoy our church (for most we wouldn’t go to church otherwise) and feel welcome and at home, then others should enjoy it too – and feel at home – and therefore it’s welcoming?!

What makes a church feel welcoming?

We feel we belong? We know people? People know us? We have a place, a role, a ministry? People know our names, smile at us, recognize us, make an effort to talk to us? We have a seat? We enjoy the style, respect the leaders, enjoy the format, find that it meets our perceived and actual needs?

We know what happens, the sort of service we will experience, the location of services, what to do at each part of a service, where the Sunday school is, or the toilets or the kitchen?

And realistically we would want to say that it extends beyond Sunday to the week – to groups, activities, membership roles, phone calls, meeting in coffee shops, shared experiences, family meals and activities. It’s about belonging – if we feel we belong then it feels welcoming.

If we think our church is welcoming, but there is no specific welcoming process, then it almost certainly feels welcoming to us because we belong. Not because it is welcoming to outsiders! We fit in – the homogenous unit principle (HUP) at work. The HUP in churches is about setting up churches that deal with specific groups – ethnic, racial, language, locality, social status etc – and only that group. Like attracting like! But it works naturally enough too – it feels welcoming – it feels like ‘home’ when the people in church are like us, share the same sorts of values and principles, where at least some are of a similar age or social standing – people we can readily identify with – and even more importantly we know them and they know us and we feel comfortable amongst the crowd, or we have a friends and acquaintances. Or we’ve been a member of the church for 10 or 20 or 60 years and of course it’s welcoming because to us its home?!

Why do so many visitors say churches are not welcoming?

Welcoming Stories

Jenny, a young woman visits a small village style church where the majority of folk have been attending for more than 10 years – and many much longer than that – a church that doesn’t get many visitors – no one talks to her except the minister and his family. She comes for a few weeks – no real change in the response – a few basic greetings, recognition – but no one really talks with her and gets to know her. She stops coming! Welcoming church?

Dianne, middle aged, fairly shy, and her husband and teenage sons start attending a new church where there is a large core group of friends – the first few weeks no one approaches them, despite a clear welcoming policy, because the minister and his wife talk to them. After a few weeks everyone leave them alone because they clearly are staying – and besides it’s a little hard talking to them because they’re shy. The family unit sticks together, they look happy – so we leave them be. They come and go with little interaction except the employed staff and their wives. Welcoming church?

Thomas, disabled man, makes the (considerable) effort to join a new church – the ministry team makes sure there is suitable space and access for the wheel chair – he’s introduced around the church – a few people make a fuss for a week or two – but after a while he is one of the crowd and everyone just assumes he feels welcome – after all he’s still coming! After a while – and he’s used to it taking a while – he stops coming because he doesn’t feel like he’s getting anywhere – even though the church has a reputation for being welcoming. Is it?

What would a welcoming church look like?

• A welcoming church…
  • Is about hospitality, where the main group of existing members is hospitable towards all people—not just people like them.
  • Stays welcoming for the long term—not just the first time people come to church but the 50th and 100th. In many churches once we realize someone is sticking around we tend to leave them be and go back to our relationships—though some don’t even do that. It takes more than a quick hello once or twice, or showing people where the toilets are.
  • Is where the cliques (and yes every church has them) work hard at not letting that get in the way of bringing more people in. One example is a church where the members decide they will spend the first 15-20 min after a service talking to newcomers.
  • Is more than just 15 minutes after church on a Sunday. What has happened to inviting people home after church for coffee or lunch? Or inviting people to your Bible Study group or other ministry?

Why do outsiders come to church? What reason does a new person have to walk in the front door of your church?

For the most part people come through invitation and friendship. They will come because they know someone at your church – even if it’s the barest possible relationship. It’s pretty hard for people to just wander in with no prior contact at all, unless it’s a very large church where it would be impossible for any one person to have contact with everyone – a newcomer can blend in, be anonymous. Actually – plenty of regulars in large churches probably like that aspect too?!?!?

In my experience, often the people you see on a Sunday who just appear to rock up out of the blue, have actually spoken to a minister and been invited – as I said, the briefest of acquaintances. Which is why ministers and anyone who answers the phone in the church office, has to be on the ball – that phone call asking about service times is not an inconvenience, or something to get out of the way – that is the opportunity to welcome someone as a friend – ask their name, engage in conversation, explain who you are, tell them that you’d love to see them and get to know them, and be ready to do so on Sunday. Instead of 30 seconds just telling them the info they are after spend 5 minutes having a chat. That person, as long as they turn up, is half-way welcomed before they set foot in the door… as long as you follow it up.

I would say people come to church mostly because of a relationship. They stay short term because of acquaintances and familiar friendly faces. They stay long term because of friendships. Steve Abbot wrote an evangelism book years ago – Friendship Evangelism – the perfect title for church welcoming. When you are getting ready for church are you thinking and praying that you might have opportunities to befriend people for Jesus? You should!

Whose task should it be to welcome people?

Yours!

Here’s where I think bluntness helps. When you go to church—don’t sit down waiting for the service to start, unless there’s only a minute or two to go. Mill about, make conversation, look for newbies, befriend them (don’t swamp them), make conversation, invite them home for Sunday lunch (be prepared with plenty of basic food ready to roll before you come to church) or meet them for a coffee during the week, invite them to Bible Study—invite them to sit with you – kick the kids out to the next row.

Can’t do it? Why are you at church?

It’s the minister’s job!? You’re kidding, right?

Why are you at church – for yourself or to serve?

Try this quick quiz!

When you first attended your church you would have gained some impressions of the place – the welcome, the people, the style, the cliques, morning tea, people’s attitudes towards you and your family, how quickly you were accepted, whether the church was attractive, open, airy etc. You might have had impressions about cleanliness, upkeep, general care, ease of accessing information, who you had to see to get involved or join groups etc.

• Write down what your impressions were – whatever you can remember.
• When did you start attending your church?
• Did you come on your own or with a spouse, family or friends?
• Why did you start at this particular church? Did someone invite you?
• Why did you come back after the first week?
• Why did you stay after the first few weeks?
• Were you new to church in general or did you come from another church? If you came from another church what was your involvement at that church?
• When you first started, how did the experience compare with other churches you’d attended (if any)?
• If you were describing your church to people who have never been there, and who were thinking of attending, what would you say about the welcome they would receive – what key words would you use?

Stay tuned for Welcoming 2!